On one of my favorite non-baseball topics

Some sharp person at McSweeney’s has answered all of those lingering questions we’ve all had about
what we could expect were we to add a zombie to our fantasy baseball team. In doing so, he gives a fairly good overview of what a zombie would bring to (or take from (hint: it’s gray)) a real team.

Thanks to Luke for pointing me to this important information.

I think the only city we’re visiting where we’ll be in real danger of finding ourselves in the midst of a zombie attack is Detroit, because, well, what other cities have more downtown hiding places for enterprising zombies?

Original comments…

thatbob: Nonsense! You’ll be in Pittsburgh, zombie capital of the world!

Jim: “All you zombies, hide your faces.”

You want us to bring you back some Iron City beer from the ‘Burgh?

thatbob: BEEEEER!!!

His Life

If the index is correct, Bill Clinton’s new book only mentions baseball once. It’s on page 620, at the start of a discussion of what a tough time the fall of 1994 was. He opens the chapter by noting that Bud Selig had just announced that negotiations with the Major League Baseball Players’ Association were at an impasse, and that the 1994 postseason would be canceled.

He talks about sending David Lindsey to try to bring the two sides together, and about how he invited both sides to the White House for a talk, to no avail.

I wonder if there’s a reference librarian out there who’d like to research where the amount of baseball talk in Clinton’s book puts it in the ranks of presidential memoirs. I read Grant’s Memoirs last week, and they don’t mention baseball, despite its reported popularity among soldiers in camp.

Original comments…

Steve: Doesn’t he talk about getting to third base?

Levi: Now that I’m twenty pages into it, I have already found another mention of baseball, albeit a very brief one. On page 19, he talks about being taken to a St. Louis Cardinals game by his stepfather. They stayed overnight and Bill loved the game and the trip. I assume the Cardinals won.

Jim: But the real question, since you obviously turned to the index first: anything along the lines of “Clinton, Bill, depicted in clothes, to disturbing effect”?

Well, I guess the effect would be a lot more disturbing if Clinton, Bill were depicted out of clothes, but you get the idea.

Levi: On page 34, baseball is mentioned again. The Clintons get a new TV and Bill enjoys watching baseball, especially Stan Musial.

Think maybe this was indexed in a hurry?

Back in the lineup

Following a mostly baseball-free trip to Lake Tahoe, I’m back in the world of the Internet (and, that means, the office). But because I have a fair amount of work to do this morning, I’ve got just some disjointed thoughts to offer.

1) Here are some things that people I overheard on the trip (at restaurants, airports, in the gondola at Squaw Valley) are more concerned about than I tend to be: Property values, cars, gas prices, commercials, and traffic. Oh, and there was the woman at the airport who was detailing to everyone in earshot the degree to which she always gets sick on airplanes. The short version: not quite sick enough to barf, but very close.

Things they are less concerned about than me: public transportation, bicycles, and baseball.

I’ll take my set any day.

2) We did get to see one game while we were on vacation. The last night of our trip we spent at Stacey’s aunt’s house in Sacramento, where I got to watch the Cardinals beat the Athletics on the Bay Area Fox Sports Network. And I got to feed Aunt Sherry’s pair of pet bunnies. It was a great day.

3) The flag at Wrigley Field at Saturday’s very chilly game was still at half staff. The Most-Loved Terrible President Ever has been dead more than three weeks! Isn’t it time to reflect his American optimism and pull that flag back up?

4) Speaking of honoring the dead, if I had been Commissioner of Baseball, “The Star-Spangled Banner” on the day Ray Charles died would have been played by solo organ or trumpet in every ballpark. It’s not like anyone is ever going to sing it better than he did at Game 2 of the 2001 World Series. Watching that performance, I was astonished that any such carefully staged moment as the pre-game National Anthem at the World Series could be so moving. On a song and in a situation where most renditions don’t even reach the level of craft, Ray Charles on that night produced art.

5) Jim’s posts recently have now doubled the amount of non-Maura-created Devil Rays content on the Internet. The infinity symbol no longer quite expresses the porn/Devil Rays ratio on the Web. Congratulations, Jim. The D-Rays will have your season tickets in the mail this week. Hope there’s room on that fast-rolling bandwagon.

6) Ron Santo and Pat Hughes on Friday had this exchange:
Ron: “Patrick, have you ever thought of writing poetry?”
Pat: “No, not really, Ron.”
Ron: “I think you should.”
Pat: “Well, I think I might just stick to broadcasting.”
Ron: “I really think you should write poetry.”
Pat: “Thanks for the vote of confidence.”

It’s good to be back.

Original comments…

sandor: Re: #3. I (regrettably) didn’t take any pictures, but in our short jaunt through southern Wisconsin this weekend, we saw an inordinate number of flags at half-mast. Probably more at half- than at full-. In fact, the larger the flag was, the greater chance it was halfway down the pole. It was astonishing.

Jim: They’re supposed to be at half-mast (or half-staff) for 30 days after a President dies. I seem to recall that 10 years ago, flag proprietors were pretty good about keeping them halfway down (or up) for a month after Nixon died, so if he can get that kind of flag cooperation, it’s no wonder Reagan is doing even better.

Levi: Wow. 30 days?

Stand me corrected!

But it still seems like an odd relic of, say, Victorian-style mourning, when you went through several specific stages of mourning with their accompanying public displays.

Toby: Levi, At Sunday’s Cardinals vs. Reds game (in which Junior hit his 500th homer), a kid from your hometown named Landon Bayley threw out the first pitch. Just an FYI.

Levi: How’d he manage to get to do that? And was it faster than Matt Morris’s fastball these days?

Toby: His grandfather is the Bayley in Martin & Bayley – the small Carmi company that built Huck’s into a major chain in the Midwest. It was Huck’s day at the ballpark. He got to meet Lou Brock, who, I believe, also threw out a ceremonial first pitch.

I’ve never clocked Landon so I don’t know if he’s faster than Morris, but I know he’s a good kid.

Actual trip-related content

The Devil Rays have an off day, and since I’ve got the AAA Tourbooks piled up around me, here are some questions for Levi et al. to ponder…

1. After the game in Davenport, when there are going to be four of us, do we want one hotel room or two? One room would be somewhat cheaper and would be a fun slumber party, but two rooms would mean two bathrooms.

2. How is Stacey getting from Detroit to Chicago — Amtrak? Greyhound? Teleportation device of some sort? The answer to this question may determine where we stay in Detroit, or perhaps I should say the greater Detroit area. (The one hotel that’s definitely within walking distance of Comerica Park is quoting what seems like a ridiculously high rate, so I’m looking elsewhere.)

3. Does either potential laptop have an Airport card (or other wireless card)? At least one potential place of lodging I’m looking at advertises free wireless Internet access.

Original comments…

sandor: 3. My available laptop does not, but perhaps you could borrow a card from someone else. Or buy one and return it a week and half later.

Levi: Ours has wireless Internet capability, if I understand such things properly.

thatbob: No, I don’t think you understand correctly. You’ll still need an Airport card. Which you might have, you should just ask Tony. But “wireless Internet capability” is a little like saying that my computer is “printer ready,” I would still need a printer.

Luke: One hotel room would be fine for this frugal hanger-on. More money for bowling.

Levi: Like, I mean that I’ve used it with the wireless internet here at work.

Does that mean I have an airport card?

sandor: Yeah, that means it’s wireless ready. It means it’ll pick up any wi-fi network it finds and allow you online, assuming it’s a free network.

stacey: monroe (our computer) will pick up any available network. also, i’m not sure if i’m going to go all the way to detroit yet . . . i was thinking maybe of just heading back from carmi. luke, want to travel together? which do you prefer?

Jim: Heading back to Chicago from Carmi with Luke will involve getting shoved out of the car at the University Park Metra station, so be aware of that. Unless you’re trying to keep your teleportation device secret from the government, wink wink.

Eleven!

The Devil Rays have now set the MLB record for longest win streak of the 2004 season. Too bad they have to play an AL team on Tuesday.

Original comments…

maura: yeah, but it’s the blue jays. who are without both vernon wells and carlos delgado.

i have faith. i mean, sheesh, mark hendrickson got out of that bases-loaded jam today, and i thought he was TOTALLY SCREWED at that point.

maura: not to mention: rocco baldelli WALKED today. when does he ever do that?!?

(rocco, if you find this via google, i still adore you! and your bobblehead is right next to my powerbook)

Levi: You know, when they were talking about moving the Diamondbacks to the AL a few years ago, maybe they were talking about the wrong team moving. I haven’t looked at the standings today, but I bet a 70-0 record would lead any National League division.

Steve: Eleven in a row is pretty awesome. But I would think that after 11 straight wins less than 1/2 way through the season the team would be a little better than 10 games out. Wasn’t Lou Pinella going around Tampa during the off-season touting how well the D-Rays were going to do. I heard something about how in the course of a week in front of three different audiences he said they would, “not finish last,” “finish third,” “challenge for a playoff spot” Paraphrasing of course…..

Levi: Also, I would think that after five seasons of finishing in last place, with almost no signs of progress, D-Rays GM Chuck LaMar would have been fired six or seven times.

maura: if they were in the al west, or al central, or nl east, they’d be less than five games out. the yankees (sigh) are running away with the al east, and boston, who the rays are now six games behind, has a better record than both those division’s leaders (and the nl east’s phillies, too)

thatbob: Gee! If I were in the al west, or al central, or nl east, maybe I’d be less than five games out, too! Gives a boy a chance to dream…

maura: 😛

I hope this is anxiety, not premonition

I just dreamed that we overslept and then dawdled and missed the second stop on this trip. However, I clearly don’t have our itinerary locked in my subconscious, since the dream was set at my aunt and uncle’s house in the Philadelphia suburbs, and we were late to Toronto. But what my subconscious did get right is that after I said to Levi something to the effect of, “It’s 4:00, so it’s too late for us to get to Toronto,” he swore loudly.

All was not lost, though, because I then grabbed the laptop and started looking up the NY-Penn League schedules. The dream ended before we made it to a game, but I’d like to think we did get to see some baseball.

The worst part of having this dream is that it was disturbing enough that I’m wide awake way too early after going to bed late last night (for those who don’t have this entire blog memorized, the posts here are being stamped in Central time, but I’m living on Pacific time).

Ten!

People in the Tampa Bay area are so shocked by the Devil Rays’ winning streak, they’re hitting the wrong pedal even more often than usual!

Oh, yeah, Levi wanted me to write about the Cardinals, didn’t he? Well, they’re only 8-2 in their last 10 games. And they may have only four losses in the month of June, but the Rays only have three losses this month. I repeat, they’re making people want to pick up their baggage at the Tampa airport really fast so they can get home to watch the games on PAX 66!

Nine!

Maybe the Devil Rays suddenly realized that the possibility exists for them to win the World Series in the same year that their hockey counterparts, the Lightning, won the Stanley Cup.

Or maybe the thought process is, “Well, we’re never going to see these NL West teams again, because we’ll probably be contracted out of existence before they come around again in the interleague rotation, so let’s make the most of it.”

More Tank McNamara, TiVo, and baseball

Whoever colorized today’s “Tank McNamara” strip has apparently never seen a TiVo remote. The buttons are in a variety of festive colors, not just red, assuming you consider gray and black to be festive colors.

Also, the colorizer has made everyone but the main characters orange, but that’s less of a problem.