Tuesday, May 20, 2008
When it says baseball, baseball, baseball on the label, label, label
I've taken advantage of some downtime at work and gone back through the history of baseballrelated.com to add labels (or, as the kids call them, "tags") to all the posts. Now you can easily read all the posts here that contain some content related to Johnny Damon -- including this one!
Only eight days until Levi and I see a baseball game together for the first time since the trip in August 2004.
Only eight days until Levi and I see a baseball game together for the first time since the trip in August 2004.
Labels: admin, johnny damon
Tuesday, December 25, 2007
Merry Christmas, ladies
"I walk around with my shirt off. If I had anything to hide, I wouldn't do that." -- Johnny Damon
Labels: johnny damon
Friday, October 06, 2006
Music to watch the playoffs by
At last, some musical content that's more on-topic than the Larry Finlayson update.
I haven't been keeping up very well with the baseball songs page (although I'm planning to update it as part of a renovation of both baseballrelated.com and my personal site, hopefully by the end of the year if I get around to it). But it's there, and its content is able to be searched, which is how I recently heard from a musician named Howie Newman.
In 1979, he recorded an EP of five original baseball songs called "Baseball's Greatest Hits" -- about a decade before Rhino ripped off the name for their compilation -- which is available both through iTunes and in the popular "compact disc" format.
He also has a couple of other original baseball songs on two more recent releases, also available via iTunes. And he has two baseball songs available as free downloads. One is off "Baseball's Greatest Hits" and is called "Astroturf." The other is more recent and is called -- well, I don't want to totally give away the surprise, so I'll just say that my collection of baseball songs now includes musical mentions of Joe DiMaggio, Ozzie Smith, and Johnny Damon.
I haven't been keeping up very well with the baseball songs page (although I'm planning to update it as part of a renovation of both baseballrelated.com and my personal site, hopefully by the end of the year if I get around to it). But it's there, and its content is able to be searched, which is how I recently heard from a musician named Howie Newman.
In 1979, he recorded an EP of five original baseball songs called "Baseball's Greatest Hits" -- about a decade before Rhino ripped off the name for their compilation -- which is available both through iTunes and in the popular "compact disc" format.
He also has a couple of other original baseball songs on two more recent releases, also available via iTunes. And he has two baseball songs available as free downloads. One is off "Baseball's Greatest Hits" and is called "Astroturf." The other is more recent and is called -- well, I don't want to totally give away the surprise, so I'll just say that my collection of baseball songs now includes musical mentions of Joe DiMaggio, Ozzie Smith, and Johnny Damon.
Labels: howie newman, johnny damon, music
Tuesday, December 20, 2005
Pure good meets pure evil; hair cut, universe destroyed
Well, despite my unemployment, I've been feeling pretty good recently. Hmm, as long as I'm sitting here in front of my computer waiting for "Deal or No Deal" to accumulate on the TiVo, I'll activate iChat. Why, I've got an instant message popping up already! It's from hanger-on Maura. She usually has something interesting to say, often about baseball. I'll just bring the message window to the front, and...OH, MY GOD, NO!
Labels: johnny damon, maura johnston, yankees
Thursday, August 04, 2005
10 innings
Acting as if I'm a real columnist having a lazy day, I present a "News and Notes" column!
1) Headline in the Sun-Times following the Palmeiro news: Caught 'roid-handed. Another good headline this week, despite not being baseball-related, was the Trib's headline announcing the appointment of a federal monitor to watch the city's hiring practices: City gets a Hall monitor. I imagine the headline writers are all staying up late these days practicing their headlines in the hopes of Daley being indicted. Me, I'm just practicing my gleeful chortle. Maybe I'll get to warm it up chortling over Rove.
2) Palmeiro and Sandberg are linked yet again, this time in Sandberg's Fire Sermon in Cooperstown on Sunday being followed so closely by Palmeiro essentially giving back his "Redeem in five years" ticket to the Hall. Those of you up on Cubs gossip will know how they were linked before, but if you need a refresher, contact me in some way that enables me to tell you the story while not being sued for libel.
3) Albert Pujols has stolen 11 bases this season without being caught. Next up for Prince Albert: some work in the offseason on his change-up so he can pick up some innings out of the bullpen.
4) Speaking of running, poor Lenny Harris, in legging out a three-run double against the Cardinals the other night in Florida, catapulted himself to the top of my list of worst baserunners in the game. He's been a slow runner for years, plagued by leg and weight problems, but these days, his build is Kruk-like and he runs as if he's on two peglegs. If this were a backyard whiffleball game, everyone would agree on special slowness rules for his ghost runner.
5) TV Guide is changing its format to not have nearly so many listings. How will I ever know when Scooter's going to grace my television? I guess I'll have to go to Jeanniezelasko.com to find out. I wonder if Jim has any thought about the changes to TV Guide?
6) In a discussion at work the other day about how to encourage bloggers who have written about our products, the idea of just contacting them with a thank-you came up. Or maybe we should send them minor-league baseball tickets?
7) After the Sox/Tigers game I attended recently at Comiskey, I was walking out next to a girl who said to a friend, "There's my bus, gotta go." She looked up to the ballpark, blew a kiss, and said, "Love ya, Comiskey."
8) After today, there's a third of the season left, and Ken Griffey Jr. has still not visited the DL.
9) For a while a few weeks back, an image search for Johnny Damon brought up a certain pumpkin as the fourth response. It's fallen back to ninth lately. Get to work, readers!
10) The Post-Dispatch reports today that the Cardinals are, after all, leaving KMOX and buying 550 AM KTRS. I think it's a big mistake, as do many other Cards fans, and I'm sad to hear about it. KMOX was the Cardinals for me for my childhood. But this is really a topic that deserves its own post soon.
1) Headline in the Sun-Times following the Palmeiro news: Caught 'roid-handed. Another good headline this week, despite not being baseball-related, was the Trib's headline announcing the appointment of a federal monitor to watch the city's hiring practices: City gets a Hall monitor. I imagine the headline writers are all staying up late these days practicing their headlines in the hopes of Daley being indicted. Me, I'm just practicing my gleeful chortle. Maybe I'll get to warm it up chortling over Rove.
2) Palmeiro and Sandberg are linked yet again, this time in Sandberg's Fire Sermon in Cooperstown on Sunday being followed so closely by Palmeiro essentially giving back his "Redeem in five years" ticket to the Hall. Those of you up on Cubs gossip will know how they were linked before, but if you need a refresher, contact me in some way that enables me to tell you the story while not being sued for libel.
3) Albert Pujols has stolen 11 bases this season without being caught. Next up for Prince Albert: some work in the offseason on his change-up so he can pick up some innings out of the bullpen.
4) Speaking of running, poor Lenny Harris, in legging out a three-run double against the Cardinals the other night in Florida, catapulted himself to the top of my list of worst baserunners in the game. He's been a slow runner for years, plagued by leg and weight problems, but these days, his build is Kruk-like and he runs as if he's on two peglegs. If this were a backyard whiffleball game, everyone would agree on special slowness rules for his ghost runner.
5) TV Guide is changing its format to not have nearly so many listings. How will I ever know when Scooter's going to grace my television? I guess I'll have to go to Jeanniezelasko.com to find out. I wonder if Jim has any thought about the changes to TV Guide?
6) In a discussion at work the other day about how to encourage bloggers who have written about our products, the idea of just contacting them with a thank-you came up. Or maybe we should send them minor-league baseball tickets?
7) After the Sox/Tigers game I attended recently at Comiskey, I was walking out next to a girl who said to a friend, "There's my bus, gotta go." She looked up to the ballpark, blew a kiss, and said, "Love ya, Comiskey."
8) After today, there's a third of the season left, and Ken Griffey Jr. has still not visited the DL.
9) For a while a few weeks back, an image search for Johnny Damon brought up a certain pumpkin as the fourth response. It's fallen back to ninth lately. Get to work, readers!
10) The Post-Dispatch reports today that the Cardinals are, after all, leaving KMOX and buying 550 AM KTRS. I think it's a big mistake, as do many other Cards fans, and I'm sad to hear about it. KMOX was the Cardinals for me for my childhood. But this is really a topic that deserves its own post soon.
Labels: Albert Pujols, Cardinals, johnny damon, ken griffey jr., lenny harris, radio, rafael palmeiro, ryne sandberg, steroids, tv guide
Sunday, July 10, 2005
Green M&M's in pie form
While I've been editing the old posts here to include the comments from the old system, I have of course been reading a lot about Hostess Baseballs. So when I took a break and went to Ralphs to do my weekly grocery shopping, I took a longing look at the section that includes Hostess, Little Debbie, and other snack pastries. As has been mentioned already here, 2005 is a year without Baseballs; however, I saw a product there that I had never seen before, and I just had to buy a couple...
That's Lemon Creme flavor on top and Vanilla Pudding flavor on the bottom. There were several other flavors available, including cherry, apple, and Chocolate Pudding. They're made by Horizon Snack Foods of Salt Lake City, so I'm sure they're just as sweet as Donny and Marie.
One problem: I don't think the caricature of Johnny Damon on the label quite does him justice. (Also, that doesn't quite look like a home run stroke, but maybe test marketing showed that a product called Bloop Single Pie didn't sell as well.)
That's Lemon Creme flavor on top and Vanilla Pudding flavor on the bottom. There were several other flavors available, including cherry, apple, and Chocolate Pudding. They're made by Horizon Snack Foods of Salt Lake City, so I'm sure they're just as sweet as Donny and Marie.
One problem: I don't think the caricature of Johnny Damon on the label quite does him justice. (Also, that doesn't quite look like a home run stroke, but maybe test marketing showed that a product called Bloop Single Pie didn't sell as well.)
Labels: food, home run pie, johnny damon
Thursday, June 02, 2005
Television programming update
The episode of "Queer Eye for the Straight Guy" featuring five members of the Red Sox airs next Tuesday, June 7th, at 10:00 P.M. Eastern on Bravo (with copious repeats throughout the following week). TV Guide gives it a 9 out of 10 and includes, as a tantalizing preview, the phrase "Johnny Damon gets foil highlights."
Also in next week's TV Guide, Superstation WGN has a full-page ad (in the color section, although it's a black-and-white ad) touting their Friday afternoon telecast of the Cubs vs. Red Sox as a rematch of the 1918 World Series, for all the TV Guide readers who have been waiting for that for 87 years. Presumably, the Saturday game is on Fox (although my DirecTV edition of TV Guide only lists what's on the national Fox schedule, so it's "teams to be announced") -- and the Sunday game is in the week-after-next's TV Guide, so as far as I'm concerned, it's a complete mystery where it's going to air.
Also in next week's TV Guide, Superstation WGN has a full-page ad (in the color section, although it's a black-and-white ad) touting their Friday afternoon telecast of the Cubs vs. Red Sox as a rematch of the 1918 World Series, for all the TV Guide readers who have been waiting for that for 87 years. Presumably, the Saturday game is on Fox (although my DirecTV edition of TV Guide only lists what's on the national Fox schedule, so it's "teams to be announced") -- and the Sunday game is in the week-after-next's TV Guide, so as far as I'm concerned, it's a complete mystery where it's going to air.
Labels: directv, johnny damon, tv, tv guide
Friday, April 22, 2005
5-card Johnny Damon
For the second day in a row, a Baseball-Related Program Activities-related comic strip; today, it's "Nancy"...
thatbob: Sluggo's insight feels remarkably thin to me, but I love to watch Johnny Damon's hat pop off in any medium.
Original comments...
thatbob: Sluggo's insight feels remarkably thin to me, but I love to watch Johnny Damon's hat pop off in any medium.
Labels: art, johnny damon
Monday, April 11, 2005
I've got the fever
As you may recall from a post here a few weeks ago, I wanted to hate the new movie "Fever Pitch." You can't truly hate what you don't know, so I went to the theater today, grumbling through the euphemistically-named "pre-show countdown," grumbling through the trailer for a Hilary Duff movie, grumbling through the trailer for a movie about girls sharing pants, really grumbling through the trailer for "Titanic" in space, and returning to a normal level of grumbling during the unexplained and unexplainable short promoting "American Dad." Then the actual movie started.
Oh, wow, it's just so downright charming, it's impossible to hate. And it's about baseball! Johnny Damon is in several scenes! The words "Devil Rays" come out of Jimmy Fallon's mouth! I didn't even mind Tim McCarver's brief appearance! It made me forget all about that other movie called "Fever Pitch" with Colin what's-his-name.
Seriously, Levi, I highly recommend that you and Stacey see it. If nothing else, it made me want to go see another game at Fenway Park, or fall in love with Drew Barrymore (or someone similarly cute), or preferably both.
Oh, wow, it's just so downright charming, it's impossible to hate. And it's about baseball! Johnny Damon is in several scenes! The words "Devil Rays" come out of Jimmy Fallon's mouth! I didn't even mind Tim McCarver's brief appearance! It made me forget all about that other movie called "Fever Pitch" with Colin what's-his-name.
Seriously, Levi, I highly recommend that you and Stacey see it. If nothing else, it made me want to go see another game at Fenway Park, or fall in love with Drew Barrymore (or someone similarly cute), or preferably both.
Labels: devil rays, drew barrymore, fever pitch, jimmy fallon, johnny damon, red sox
Sunday, April 03, 2005
Kitty loves baseball
I was planning on giving Levi the first word on the first game of the season, but I think he'll agree that it was vitally important that I post this picture of my cat Chessie (who jumped off the TV shelf once the Yankees started winning)...
And I assume this commercial was met with great joy and delight in Rocketship-land...
Levi: Damn you, TiVo! I missed that ad completely!
Jim: That's why I haven't enabled the semi-secret "30-second skip" option -- I want to see what I'm fast-forwarding through, just in case.
I guess now you'll have to watch the commercials on every single baseball game until you see this Johnny Damon one!
And I assume this commercial was met with great joy and delight in Rocketship-land...
Original comments...
Levi: Damn you, TiVo! I missed that ad completely!
Jim: That's why I haven't enabled the semi-secret "30-second skip" option -- I want to see what I'm fast-forwarding through, just in case.
I guess now you'll have to watch the commercials on every single baseball game until you see this Johnny Damon one!
Labels: cats, johnny damon, red sox, tv, yankees
Friday, April 01, 2005
He's everywhere!
Johnny Damon is on the cover of the new issue of Entertainment Weekly, along with non-baseball players Jimmy Fallon and Drew Barrymore. The cover story is on "Fever Pitch," of course, not the baseball season.
Labels: drew barrymore, fever pitch, jimmy fallon, johnny damon
Opening night
Could we possibly ask for a better Opening Night game?
Sunday night, we get the World Champion Boston Red Sox at Yankee Stadium against the World Champion (Choker Division) New York Yankees.
For the second year in a row, Johnny Damon will be our first sight of the baseball season, stepping into the box in all his glory.
And on the mound, we get pure contrast. David Wells v. Randy Johnson. Junkballer v. Flamethrower. One of the roundest guys in baseball v. the tallest, skinniest. They ought to go on the road as a comedy team. They're listed at Baseball-reference.com as weighing the same, despite the Unit's six-inch height advantage. Now that's comedy.
It's time. Y'all are invited for chili and corn bread.
Sunday night, we get the World Champion Boston Red Sox at Yankee Stadium against the World Champion (Choker Division) New York Yankees.
For the second year in a row, Johnny Damon will be our first sight of the baseball season, stepping into the box in all his glory.
And on the mound, we get pure contrast. David Wells v. Randy Johnson. Junkballer v. Flamethrower. One of the roundest guys in baseball v. the tallest, skinniest. They ought to go on the road as a comedy team. They're listed at Baseball-reference.com as weighing the same, despite the Unit's six-inch height advantage. Now that's comedy.
It's time. Y'all are invited for chili and corn bread.
Labels: david wells, johnny damon, randy johnson, red sox, yankees
Thursday, March 17, 2005
Some things gold can stay
To distract you all from the rat and pony show going on in DC today*, here's a bit of good news passed on by BRPA reader Becky:
Five Red Sox players (Varitek, Millar, Mirabelli, Wakefield**, and our own Johnny Damon) will soon appear on Queer Eye for the Straight Guy, but Johnny Damon has refused to cut his hair for the show. His reason? Because of his forthcoming book, he's contractually obligated to keep it long! What a great idea! If anyone can get Craig Wilson to sign such a contract, please do. And while you're at it, maybe get Matt Morris to sign something promising to shave that fungus off his chin?
*Excuse me if I can't get worked up about publicity-hungry Congressmen feigning outrage over what Mark McGwire might have jabbed in his ass. Once our esteemed representatives can bother to get themselves worked up enough about, say, the fact that our troops were sent, ill-equipped and without a plan into a war of choice, then I'll perk up when they want to grandstand about how baseball is harming our kids.
**Is being a knuckleballer the closest thing, in baseball terms, to being gay?
Jason: Were our representatives ever esteemed?
Jim: Similar sentiments were expressed on "The Daily Show" this week with regard to the steroid hearings, but I'm pretty sure Levi doesn't watch "TDS" (it's too hard if you don't have a subscription for your TiVo), so this post was wholly original, not just the part about Craig Wilson.
Toby: Levi, Nice reference to the Robert Frost poem (which is also somewhat a reference to the Stevie Wonder song, "Stay Gold") in the header. And yes, I believe being a knuckleballer is... (I laughed out loud when I read that)
thatbob: I think that now, more than ever, being gay in baseball is probably the closest thing to being gay in baseball. But being a knuckleballer might be the closest thing to being, say, a practicing Zoroastrian in baseball. (I was going to say being a practicing Zen Buddhist philosopher in baseball, but then I remembered Yogi Berra was a catcher.)
Levi: Yeah, I should clarify what I meant: clearly, the closest thing to being gay in baseball is being gay. But, since baseball is self-defined as macho--and straight--but the knuckleball is both not macho and not generally trusted, by non-knuckleballers, pitching coaches, and teammates, I think the grudging acceptance of a good knuckleballer by his teammates--i.e., "He's on our side, so he's okay, I guess."--would be, I posit, kind of similar to the way a clubhouse would, after an adjustment period, deal with a teammate whom the team members learned was gay.
Five Red Sox players (Varitek, Millar, Mirabelli, Wakefield**, and our own Johnny Damon) will soon appear on Queer Eye for the Straight Guy, but Johnny Damon has refused to cut his hair for the show. His reason? Because of his forthcoming book, he's contractually obligated to keep it long! What a great idea! If anyone can get Craig Wilson to sign such a contract, please do. And while you're at it, maybe get Matt Morris to sign something promising to shave that fungus off his chin?
*Excuse me if I can't get worked up about publicity-hungry Congressmen feigning outrage over what Mark McGwire might have jabbed in his ass. Once our esteemed representatives can bother to get themselves worked up enough about, say, the fact that our troops were sent, ill-equipped and without a plan into a war of choice, then I'll perk up when they want to grandstand about how baseball is harming our kids.
**Is being a knuckleballer the closest thing, in baseball terms, to being gay?
Original comments...
Jason: Were our representatives ever esteemed?
Jim: Similar sentiments were expressed on "The Daily Show" this week with regard to the steroid hearings, but I'm pretty sure Levi doesn't watch "TDS" (it's too hard if you don't have a subscription for your TiVo), so this post was wholly original, not just the part about Craig Wilson.
Toby: Levi, Nice reference to the Robert Frost poem (which is also somewhat a reference to the Stevie Wonder song, "Stay Gold") in the header. And yes, I believe being a knuckleballer is... (I laughed out loud when I read that)
thatbob: I think that now, more than ever, being gay in baseball is probably the closest thing to being gay in baseball. But being a knuckleballer might be the closest thing to being, say, a practicing Zoroastrian in baseball. (I was going to say being a practicing Zen Buddhist philosopher in baseball, but then I remembered Yogi Berra was a catcher.)
Levi: Yeah, I should clarify what I meant: clearly, the closest thing to being gay in baseball is being gay. But, since baseball is self-defined as macho--and straight--but the knuckleball is both not macho and not generally trusted, by non-knuckleballers, pitching coaches, and teammates, I think the grudging acceptance of a good knuckleballer by his teammates--i.e., "He's on our side, so he's okay, I guess."--would be, I posit, kind of similar to the way a clubhouse would, after an adjustment period, deal with a teammate whom the team members learned was gay.
Labels: johnny damon, steroids
Thursday, March 03, 2005
The Gospel According to . . .
Johnny Damon.
I'm in line already.
Jim: Hey, we went to two Red Sox games in 2004. Where's our book deal?
Levi: I was on the verge of signing us to a book deal with a major New York trade house, but, as the fine print required us both to grow long hair and a beard, I balked.
Jason: You could have borrowed my hair & beard.
Jim: Just to point this out for anyone reading this who don't know us personally: as you can see from the photo at the top of the page, I already have a beard, and although I keep my hair cut short, I could easily grow it long. Levi is the one who couldn't look like Johnny Damon if he tried. Also, ladies, I'm currently unattached.
I'm in line already.
Original comments...
Jim: Hey, we went to two Red Sox games in 2004. Where's our book deal?
Levi: I was on the verge of signing us to a book deal with a major New York trade house, but, as the fine print required us both to grow long hair and a beard, I balked.
Jason: You could have borrowed my hair & beard.
Jim: Just to point this out for anyone reading this who don't know us personally: as you can see from the photo at the top of the page, I already have a beard, and although I keep my hair cut short, I could easily grow it long. Levi is the one who couldn't look like Johnny Damon if he tried. Also, ladies, I'm currently unattached.
Labels: baseball books, johnny damon
Wednesday, November 17, 2004
Who else?
Bad:
As a lover of symmetry, I had hoped that Johnny Damon, having been the first batter of the season, would oblige me by being the last batter of the season. It is purely incidental that such a result would also have only been possible due to the Cardinals winning the World Series. Sadly, Johnny wasn't interested in symmetry.
Good:
This. And Damon had one of his best seasons, which might encourage other players to go all shaggy. Who wouldn't love to see Albert Pujols with a Damon look?
Toby: This is totally off the subject, but Levi, you might be interested to know that a kid from your hometown, Steven Smith, has just signed to play with Kansas University, where one of his teammates will be A. J. Van Slyke, the son of former Cardinal Andy Van Slyke.
As a Pirate fan, I sure do wish Francisco Cabrerra would have hit that ball to center field in 1992. If so, Van Slyke's throw to the plate would have been on the money, unlike the 7-time MVP's. Mike "Spanky" LaValliere made a superb catch and dive--all in one motion--just to make that play close.
stacey: http://therocketship.com/baseball/images/bearded_albert.jpg
As a lover of symmetry, I had hoped that Johnny Damon, having been the first batter of the season, would oblige me by being the last batter of the season. It is purely incidental that such a result would also have only been possible due to the Cardinals winning the World Series. Sadly, Johnny wasn't interested in symmetry.
Good:
This. And Damon had one of his best seasons, which might encourage other players to go all shaggy. Who wouldn't love to see Albert Pujols with a Damon look?
Original comments...
Toby: This is totally off the subject, but Levi, you might be interested to know that a kid from your hometown, Steven Smith, has just signed to play with Kansas University, where one of his teammates will be A. J. Van Slyke, the son of former Cardinal Andy Van Slyke.
As a Pirate fan, I sure do wish Francisco Cabrerra would have hit that ball to center field in 1992. If so, Van Slyke's throw to the plate would have been on the money, unlike the 7-time MVP's. Mike "Spanky" LaValliere made a superb catch and dive--all in one motion--just to make that play close.
stacey: http://therocketship.com/baseball/images/bearded_albert.jpg
Labels: Albert Pujols, johnny damon
Monday, November 15, 2004
Johnny Damon's still in the news
A baseballrelated.com fan (and/or a Johnny Damon fan) passes along this link to an article about the Red Sox being honored before the New England Patriots game last night. I don't usually watch the Sunday night football game, so I didn't see it. ("The Lighthouse in the Forest"? Maybe I'm just unaware of how far out of town Foxboro is.)
Labels: johnny damon
Wednesday, November 03, 2004
Election, shmelection
Time for something really important: an allusion to Johnny Damon in today's "Get Fuzzy."
Toby: Hilarious, Jim! Thanks for posting it. Levi, are you going to stay in a depressed state forever? Come on, snap out of it. Post something! Gold gloves, new managers, free agents, your picks for MVP, Cy Young... something!!
Jim: The current state of syndicated newspaper comics amazes me, because back when I was a kid and studied up on such things because I had dreams of being a cartoonist, it was always "you have to work eight weeks ahead, although maybe the syndicate will let you get away with six if you're a big name." But now because of all the speed-ups in the production and distribution processes, a cartoonist can work only a week and a half ahead. (The Yankees lost on Wednesday, October 20th, and this week of strips about them losing started on Monday, November 1st.)
Levi: No--it's not baseball depression that's keeping me from posting. It's my heavy workload right now. That should lighten up tomorrow just enough for me to post, then get busy again for about a week, then lighten a bit through the end of the month. So I'll be with it again soon. I've enjoyed this forum with Jim and you all way too much to let it die in the offseason. We may have to change the name to reflect the new season, but there's no reason not to keep at it.
Jason: Speaking of comic strips, I just purchased "The Complete Peanuts: 1953-1954". Are they still only going to come out with 2 per year? At that rate, I won't be able to collect 'em all, since there won't be any Social Security money left.
Levi: Was that Jason Kaifesh, or Andy Rooney? Seriously. Read his comment in your Andy Rooney voice and see how appropriate it sounds.
Hell, read everything in your Andy Rooney voice. It's good for you.
Original comments...
Toby: Hilarious, Jim! Thanks for posting it. Levi, are you going to stay in a depressed state forever? Come on, snap out of it. Post something! Gold gloves, new managers, free agents, your picks for MVP, Cy Young... something!!
Jim: The current state of syndicated newspaper comics amazes me, because back when I was a kid and studied up on such things because I had dreams of being a cartoonist, it was always "you have to work eight weeks ahead, although maybe the syndicate will let you get away with six if you're a big name." But now because of all the speed-ups in the production and distribution processes, a cartoonist can work only a week and a half ahead. (The Yankees lost on Wednesday, October 20th, and this week of strips about them losing started on Monday, November 1st.)
Levi: No--it's not baseball depression that's keeping me from posting. It's my heavy workload right now. That should lighten up tomorrow just enough for me to post, then get busy again for about a week, then lighten a bit through the end of the month. So I'll be with it again soon. I've enjoyed this forum with Jim and you all way too much to let it die in the offseason. We may have to change the name to reflect the new season, but there's no reason not to keep at it.
Jason: Speaking of comic strips, I just purchased "The Complete Peanuts: 1953-1954". Are they still only going to come out with 2 per year? At that rate, I won't be able to collect 'em all, since there won't be any Social Security money left.
Levi: Was that Jason Kaifesh, or Andy Rooney? Seriously. Read his comment in your Andy Rooney voice and see how appropriate it sounds.
Hell, read everything in your Andy Rooney voice. It's good for you.
Labels: get fuzzy, johnny damon
Monday, October 25, 2004
Johnny-o-Lantern
I'm too busy today to really comment on how poorly the weekend went for the Cardinals. So all I'll do is share with you the jack-o-lantern Stacey made Saturday. She also made a Cardinals one, but I don't have a photo yet.
Cushie: Stacey is a genius.
Jim: My co-worker Joe at first thought the Johnny-o-Lantern was Photoshopped. Perhaps after Halloween, Stacey can mail him the desiccated husk of the pumpkin.
Original comments:
Cushie: Stacey is a genius.
Jim: My co-worker Joe at first thought the Johnny-o-Lantern was Photoshopped. Perhaps after Halloween, Stacey can mail him the desiccated husk of the pumpkin.
Labels: jack o' lantern, johnny damon, stacey shintani
Wednesday, October 20, 2004
Shining, gleaming, streaming, flaxen, waxen
I think, at this point, all I can do is quote Levi's post from way back on April 5th.
maura: and look at that kid tonight!! looks like the trim worked!!
Steve: If I wasn't taking another crack at joining the foreign service tomorrow I would come over and show everyone the Johnny Damon autograph on my boobs. I still liked him better with the buzz but whatever.
I stand corrected!
I may have a new favorite non-Cardinal player.
Last night, we had a couple of people over to watch the opener between the Red Sox and the Orioles. We settled in, started the TiVo, and the first image of the season caused everyone to gasp in sheer, unadulterated awe. Johnny Damon, over the winter, turned into a god. He grew out his already shaggy hair so that it hangs over his shoulders, trailing out of his batting helmet or cap. And he grew a beard. It was hard to concentrate on what he was doing during his first at-bat, because all anyone in the room could look at or think about was all that hair. Then, on his first play in the outfield, he was coming in for a ball, not too fast, and it looked like there was no hope of his cap falling off. Everyone was disappointed. Then, like a silent prayer being answered, the cap popped off his head and his glossy locks floated free. There was much cheering in the Rocketship.
I apologize for not having a link to a photo. I haven't seen one today, which just tells me, once again, that the majority of sportswriters have been doing their jobs so long that they no longer really love sports. Otherwise, today's headlines would be along the lines of: Damon's Hair, Beard Open a Glorious Season.
You know it's going to be a great year now.
Original comments...
maura: and look at that kid tonight!! looks like the trim worked!!
Steve: If I wasn't taking another crack at joining the foreign service tomorrow I would come over and show everyone the Johnny Damon autograph on my boobs. I still liked him better with the buzz but whatever.
I stand corrected!
Labels: johnny damon
Friday, October 15, 2004
Two to go!
I feel bad that, at the best time of the year for baseball, I've been incommunicado. Work has just been too busy. But I couldn't put off at least posting a few post-season thoughts.
1) I've always liked Jorge Posada, but I like him even more now that I learn (from Luke) that he buried Fox Sports' absurd new "Diamond Cam" a few nights ago. The Diamond Cam answers a question that fans have been wishing they could see since before the invention of television: What would a hitter standing in the box look like if you were a zombie just about to dig his way out of his grave right by home plate? Bob deserves the credit for realizing that it was a zombie's point of view that Fox was representing. He also deserves credit for groaning, zombie-style, every time the Zombie cam appears.
2) Last night, we had a nice little crowd at the Rocketship. Sarah brought her knitting and some fine, fine cobbler. Sandy brought his computer and some silicon chips, and Bob brought his appetite and his fine, fine zombie impression. Stacey fell asleep on the couch, but woke up for the good parts. And a couple of audience members had the confidence in our boys in red to go home before the end.
3) One point that I'm sure King Kaufmann is going to touch on in his Salon column today: one part of the three-headed cliche monster that Fox has saddled us with in this series said late in last night's game, "One problem for the Astros is that they haven't been able to get Brad Lidge, their best reliever, in the game." Which, of course, is not true. The Astros have chosen not to get their best reliever in the game, because their manager, Phil "Scrap Iron" Garner, has not wanted to use Lidge except in a save situation. Only, if you bring in someone else to pitch to Pujols and Rolen in the 8th inning of a tie game, you're not ever going to have a save situation. And suddenly you're in a 2 games to none hole.
4) What can be said about the Red Sox? Sad, sad, sad. Here's hoping that losing to the Yankees won't make Johnny Damon reconsider his grooming habits.
5) Baseball Reference has the 2004 stats up. That was quick. Not that many of those links are to 2004, but you folks already know what happened in 2004.
1) I've always liked Jorge Posada, but I like him even more now that I learn (from Luke) that he buried Fox Sports' absurd new "Diamond Cam" a few nights ago. The Diamond Cam answers a question that fans have been wishing they could see since before the invention of television: What would a hitter standing in the box look like if you were a zombie just about to dig his way out of his grave right by home plate? Bob deserves the credit for realizing that it was a zombie's point of view that Fox was representing. He also deserves credit for groaning, zombie-style, every time the Zombie cam appears.
2) Last night, we had a nice little crowd at the Rocketship. Sarah brought her knitting and some fine, fine cobbler. Sandy brought his computer and some silicon chips, and Bob brought his appetite and his fine, fine zombie impression. Stacey fell asleep on the couch, but woke up for the good parts. And a couple of audience members had the confidence in our boys in red to go home before the end.
3) One point that I'm sure King Kaufmann is going to touch on in his Salon column today: one part of the three-headed cliche monster that Fox has saddled us with in this series said late in last night's game, "One problem for the Astros is that they haven't been able to get Brad Lidge, their best reliever, in the game." Which, of course, is not true. The Astros have chosen not to get their best reliever in the game, because their manager, Phil "Scrap Iron" Garner, has not wanted to use Lidge except in a save situation. Only, if you bring in someone else to pitch to Pujols and Rolen in the 8th inning of a tie game, you're not ever going to have a save situation. And suddenly you're in a 2 games to none hole.
4) What can be said about the Red Sox? Sad, sad, sad. Here's hoping that losing to the Yankees won't make Johnny Damon reconsider his grooming habits.
5) Baseball Reference has the 2004 stats up. That was quick. Not that many of those links are to 2004, but you folks already know what happened in 2004.
Labels: bob conrad, johnny damon, jorge posada, King Kaufman, red sox, sandy weisz, sarah lieberman, stacey shintani
Wednesday, October 06, 2004
The first games
I'm still busy busy busy at work, but I couldn't let the first games pass with no comment, so here's a quick post with no links, mainly designed to get other people's impressions of yesterday's games.
1) I know one game does not a series make, but I very much enjoyed the dazed look that Odalis Perez wore when he left the mound in yesterday's Cards/Dodgers game. The last time a team hit five home runs in a game in a division series--wait--no team had ever done that before. It was a good start.
2) I was a bit bothered by the curtain calls at Busch Stadium yesterday, though. Curtain calls seem to me to be a bit disrespectful. I know players feel like the crowd is compelling them to come out, and they have to do it to shut up the crowd, but like a band after playing a perfunctory encore, they should just ignore the noise. Eventually it'll go away. No matter how hard I stomped my feet at his show, Nick Lowe wasn't going to come back out and play "I've Been Everywhere."
3) The Red Sox did as expected. I expect they'll do more of the same in games 2 and 3. And Johnny Damon's hair seems to be even longer than before: it's down past his shoulders.
4) I finally saw Scooter the Talking Baseball last night. Acting as if it were the most ordinary thing in the world, Joe Buck said, "And now, to tell us some more about the change-up, here's Scooter." And there he was, unsettlingly flesh-colored, with a weird stitching mouth and backwards ball cap. Until that moment, I was still trying to make myself believe that he was a figment of Jim's imagination. But no: Fox really does think kids are this stupid.
5) After the umpires took back the Sierra home run last night, deciding that it was foul after all, I decided that the only thing better than a Yankee making an out is a Yankee thinking he's hit a home run, then making an out. I decided that every time a Yankee hits a foul ball--even just a grounder--the umpires should wave their fingers for a home run, make the hitter run the bases, then confer and send him back to the plate. Now that would be fun.
Levi: Oh, and how could I have forgotten the way the radar gun reading bursts into flames any time a pitch gets above about 92 mph? What a wealth of new excitement that brought to my enjoyment of the game! Thank you, Fox! Thank you!
maura: that near-hr was ruben sierra's, actually. he promptly struck out.
Levi: Thanks, Mo. I fixed it.
Jason: When is Fox going to bring out the blue dot to follow where the ball goes? And when will we see Calista Flockhart eating a hot dog?!?!?
stacey: i was DEEPLY disappointed that sierra was not required to run the bases in reverse.
1) I know one game does not a series make, but I very much enjoyed the dazed look that Odalis Perez wore when he left the mound in yesterday's Cards/Dodgers game. The last time a team hit five home runs in a game in a division series--wait--no team had ever done that before. It was a good start.
2) I was a bit bothered by the curtain calls at Busch Stadium yesterday, though. Curtain calls seem to me to be a bit disrespectful. I know players feel like the crowd is compelling them to come out, and they have to do it to shut up the crowd, but like a band after playing a perfunctory encore, they should just ignore the noise. Eventually it'll go away. No matter how hard I stomped my feet at his show, Nick Lowe wasn't going to come back out and play "I've Been Everywhere."
3) The Red Sox did as expected. I expect they'll do more of the same in games 2 and 3. And Johnny Damon's hair seems to be even longer than before: it's down past his shoulders.
4) I finally saw Scooter the Talking Baseball last night. Acting as if it were the most ordinary thing in the world, Joe Buck said, "And now, to tell us some more about the change-up, here's Scooter." And there he was, unsettlingly flesh-colored, with a weird stitching mouth and backwards ball cap. Until that moment, I was still trying to make myself believe that he was a figment of Jim's imagination. But no: Fox really does think kids are this stupid.
5) After the umpires took back the Sierra home run last night, deciding that it was foul after all, I decided that the only thing better than a Yankee making an out is a Yankee thinking he's hit a home run, then making an out. I decided that every time a Yankee hits a foul ball--even just a grounder--the umpires should wave their fingers for a home run, make the hitter run the bases, then confer and send him back to the plate. Now that would be fun.
Original comments...
Levi: Oh, and how could I have forgotten the way the radar gun reading bursts into flames any time a pitch gets above about 92 mph? What a wealth of new excitement that brought to my enjoyment of the game! Thank you, Fox! Thank you!
maura: that near-hr was ruben sierra's, actually. he promptly struck out.
Levi: Thanks, Mo. I fixed it.
Jason: When is Fox going to bring out the blue dot to follow where the ball goes? And when will we see Calista Flockhart eating a hot dog?!?!?
stacey: i was DEEPLY disappointed that sierra was not required to run the bases in reverse.
Labels: Cardinals, dodgers, joe buck, johnny damon, odalis perez, red sox, ruben sierra, Scooter
Friday, October 01, 2004
Bicycle rider, just see what you've done
Think us seeing 11 games in 11 cities in 10 days was an accomplishment? A man named Charlie Hamilton went to all 30 major league ballparks over this season, traveling around North America by bicycle, raising money for charity, occasionally staying in motels like this one, which probably isn't listed in the AAA book.
His web site is a little bit behind on updates, but that's understandable, since he was traveling around North America by bicycle for much of the baseball season. I know he did finally make it to the Red Sox-Yankees game on September 26th because it was mentioned in the L.A. Times.
His journal entries are amusing, and Levi and the hangers-on who regularly ride bicycles will probably enjoy them even more than I do. But he also makes pronouncements I think we all can get behind, such as, "I got to see more of [Johnny] Damon, and he's acting a little weird. When he signs something or other for someone, do you think he signs it 'Johnny H. Damon'?" and "In my book, anyone who spoils the cat is fine people."
His web site is a little bit behind on updates, but that's understandable, since he was traveling around North America by bicycle for much of the baseball season. I know he did finally make it to the Red Sox-Yankees game on September 26th because it was mentioned in the L.A. Times.
His journal entries are amusing, and Levi and the hangers-on who regularly ride bicycles will probably enjoy them even more than I do. But he also makes pronouncements I think we all can get behind, such as, "I got to see more of [Johnny] Damon, and he's acting a little weird. When he signs something or other for someone, do you think he signs it 'Johnny H. Damon'?" and "In my book, anyone who spoils the cat is fine people."
Labels: bicycle, johnny damon, road trip
Saturday, August 28, 2004
Boston pictures
The Fenway Park grandstands and the .406 Club (behind the glass)...
There's a monstrous wall in left field, mostly painted green...
Home team batting order, with Johnny Damon at the top...
Johnny Damon in the field in front of us...
The right field foul pole, just kind of in the middle of the stands, which are at a very shallow angle at that point...
Moon rising over Fenway Park...
I can't get away from Amtrak...
The final line...
I assume the headline would make more sense if I'd spent more time in Boston...
Labels: boston, brpa, Fenway Park, johnny damon, photos, red sox, road trip, tigers
Bowing at the Altar of Damon
Some thoughts on Fenway Park and the 3-1 Red Sox win we saw.
1) It’s wonderful when something you’ve heard about all your life fully lives up to its billing. Fenway did. It’s a nearly perfect ballpark. Really, there’s not a lot I could say about Fenway that’s not already been said elsewhere. Everything you’ve heard is true. It’s cozy enough that even from our seats 13 rows up in dead center, we felt close to the action. The long rows and tight spaces discourage the sort of incessant milling around that the crowds at, say, Wrigley Field are prone to. And while the high walls and blocky upper deck block any view of the neighborhood, that means that once you’re in Fenway, everything is centered around the game. The ballpark maintains an enclosed, insular feeling such that even the drunk fans gave the impression of being at least somewhat attentive, and most fans were concentrating on every pitch. It was a wonderful place to see a ballgame.
2) The current ownership of the Red Sox, having decided that, rather than attempt to extort a replacement for Fenway from the city like the previous owners attempted to do, they would take advantage of having one of the best ballparks in baseball while still taking every chance they could to squeeze more money out of it. To that end, they’ve made some changes that I suppose might bother longtime Sox fans, but that I thought were actually pretty good. They added seats to the top of the Green Monster. They added some seats to the roof of the upper deck. They added (I think) another section of upper deck just past the end of the grandstand in right. And, to me the most surprising: they seem to have talked the city into letting them more or less take over Yawkey Way on game day. Turnstiles are set up in the middle of the street, and once you’re past them, you’re in the park. Towards the back of the outfield grandstands, it appears that they’ve actually moved the exterior walls of the park out onto what would have been the sidewalk, allowing the Sox to open up what had formerly been a cramped concourse under the stands. They’ve used the space to make navigating the park easier and to put up more of the things the contemporary fan is said to want: food stands, urinals, and more food stands. It’s a successful alteration, one that I think I wouldn’t even have noticed had I not been there on a non-game-day tour in 1993.
3) If I didn’t know that Paul Harvey is a Midwesterner, I would have thought he was working as the Red Sox public address announcer last night. The announcer had Harvey’s voice, inflections, tone, and cadences. Jim and I both expected him to end his announcements with “Good day.” Regardless, he was without a doubt the best PA announcer we’ve heard on the trip. Late in the game, with the crowd absolutely ecstatic singing along to “Sweet Caroline” between innings, he began to announce a pitching change for the Tigers. Noticing that the crowd was still shouting “Bump-ba-dah,” he paused, let the last notes of the song pass, and completed his announcement.
4) The guys behind us, four early twenty-somethings down from New York for their first Fenway game, were the sort of drunkies who tend to bug me a lot at Wrigley, in part because they’re always up and down and milling around. But these guys just didn’t bug me that much. They were loud, but a lot of their talk was about the game, and much of the time, when it was off-topic, it was fairly entertaining. Like when one guy was talking about Emeril, and another guy had never heard of Emeril, and the first guy spent ten minutes explaining who Emeril is, complete with a lot of: “You know--Bam! Bam! That guy--Bam!”
5) I do have one suggestion for PA operators at stadiums nationwide: just because a band records a song about your team/ballpark, you shouldn’t play it unless it also doesn’t suck. The only dissonant note in the whole night was the four minutes, pre-game, we had to spend listening to a terrible country (Country? In New England? Why?) song called “Having a Ball at Fenway.” It sucked more than the Blue Jays song; the only reason it wasn’t worse overall was that it wasn’t like spreading throw-up all over the seventh-inning stretch with a butter knife the way the Blue Jays song was.
That song aside, though, the organist and PA people were solid. The organist began the game with “Selections from Jim’s iPod,” which began with “Walk Away Renee” and went on to "Eight Days a Week” and “After the Gold Rush,” among others. Later, I--who usually am not excited all that much by stadium crowd singalongs--got a big kick out of hearing the crowd sing along to “Summer Wind,” then go absolutely brains-melting crazy over “Sweet Caroline.” It’s as big as “Hey Ya!”
It was odd for me to see Red Sox fans--who generally appear to be some of the most attentive fans in baseball--doing the wave and bouncing beach balls.
6) Everyone knows that the Red Sox are Yankee-obsessed. But Jesus, people. “Yankees suck!” chants cropped up without provocation, and anti-Yankee t-shirts were selling nearly as well as Johnny Damon shirts. It’s like the slacker kid in high school constantly writing mean things about the cool kids in his notebook. Sure, I’ve got sympathy, but at the end of the day, he keeps doing it, and he’s just using up space in his notebook he could be using to transcribe Violent Femmes lyrics.
7) The Red Sox scoreboard advertises a new service: if a fan feels his enjoyment of the game is being hindered by, say, drunk and rowdy fans nearby, he can, rather than wait for an usher to show up, call the security hotline on his phone. Not that I’m a fan of using the phone at games, but given that Wrigley Field ushers never seem to be around when drunks begin chucking peanuts at everyone in sight, I could imagine being able to phone security might be helpful. The trick would be avoiding getting a beer dumped on your head while you phoned.
8) And Johnny Damon got a couple of hits, stole a base, scored a run, made a couple of catches. And the Mike Timlin made another great appearance out of the Sox bullpen. And the Sox won, running me and Jim to 6-0 on the trip.
1) It’s wonderful when something you’ve heard about all your life fully lives up to its billing. Fenway did. It’s a nearly perfect ballpark. Really, there’s not a lot I could say about Fenway that’s not already been said elsewhere. Everything you’ve heard is true. It’s cozy enough that even from our seats 13 rows up in dead center, we felt close to the action. The long rows and tight spaces discourage the sort of incessant milling around that the crowds at, say, Wrigley Field are prone to. And while the high walls and blocky upper deck block any view of the neighborhood, that means that once you’re in Fenway, everything is centered around the game. The ballpark maintains an enclosed, insular feeling such that even the drunk fans gave the impression of being at least somewhat attentive, and most fans were concentrating on every pitch. It was a wonderful place to see a ballgame.
2) The current ownership of the Red Sox, having decided that, rather than attempt to extort a replacement for Fenway from the city like the previous owners attempted to do, they would take advantage of having one of the best ballparks in baseball while still taking every chance they could to squeeze more money out of it. To that end, they’ve made some changes that I suppose might bother longtime Sox fans, but that I thought were actually pretty good. They added seats to the top of the Green Monster. They added some seats to the roof of the upper deck. They added (I think) another section of upper deck just past the end of the grandstand in right. And, to me the most surprising: they seem to have talked the city into letting them more or less take over Yawkey Way on game day. Turnstiles are set up in the middle of the street, and once you’re past them, you’re in the park. Towards the back of the outfield grandstands, it appears that they’ve actually moved the exterior walls of the park out onto what would have been the sidewalk, allowing the Sox to open up what had formerly been a cramped concourse under the stands. They’ve used the space to make navigating the park easier and to put up more of the things the contemporary fan is said to want: food stands, urinals, and more food stands. It’s a successful alteration, one that I think I wouldn’t even have noticed had I not been there on a non-game-day tour in 1993.
3) If I didn’t know that Paul Harvey is a Midwesterner, I would have thought he was working as the Red Sox public address announcer last night. The announcer had Harvey’s voice, inflections, tone, and cadences. Jim and I both expected him to end his announcements with “Good day.” Regardless, he was without a doubt the best PA announcer we’ve heard on the trip. Late in the game, with the crowd absolutely ecstatic singing along to “Sweet Caroline” between innings, he began to announce a pitching change for the Tigers. Noticing that the crowd was still shouting “Bump-ba-dah,” he paused, let the last notes of the song pass, and completed his announcement.
4) The guys behind us, four early twenty-somethings down from New York for their first Fenway game, were the sort of drunkies who tend to bug me a lot at Wrigley, in part because they’re always up and down and milling around. But these guys just didn’t bug me that much. They were loud, but a lot of their talk was about the game, and much of the time, when it was off-topic, it was fairly entertaining. Like when one guy was talking about Emeril, and another guy had never heard of Emeril, and the first guy spent ten minutes explaining who Emeril is, complete with a lot of: “You know--Bam! Bam! That guy--Bam!”
5) I do have one suggestion for PA operators at stadiums nationwide: just because a band records a song about your team/ballpark, you shouldn’t play it unless it also doesn’t suck. The only dissonant note in the whole night was the four minutes, pre-game, we had to spend listening to a terrible country (Country? In New England? Why?) song called “Having a Ball at Fenway.” It sucked more than the Blue Jays song; the only reason it wasn’t worse overall was that it wasn’t like spreading throw-up all over the seventh-inning stretch with a butter knife the way the Blue Jays song was.
That song aside, though, the organist and PA people were solid. The organist began the game with “Selections from Jim’s iPod,” which began with “Walk Away Renee” and went on to "Eight Days a Week” and “After the Gold Rush,” among others. Later, I--who usually am not excited all that much by stadium crowd singalongs--got a big kick out of hearing the crowd sing along to “Summer Wind,” then go absolutely brains-melting crazy over “Sweet Caroline.” It’s as big as “Hey Ya!”
It was odd for me to see Red Sox fans--who generally appear to be some of the most attentive fans in baseball--doing the wave and bouncing beach balls.
6) Everyone knows that the Red Sox are Yankee-obsessed. But Jesus, people. “Yankees suck!” chants cropped up without provocation, and anti-Yankee t-shirts were selling nearly as well as Johnny Damon shirts. It’s like the slacker kid in high school constantly writing mean things about the cool kids in his notebook. Sure, I’ve got sympathy, but at the end of the day, he keeps doing it, and he’s just using up space in his notebook he could be using to transcribe Violent Femmes lyrics.
7) The Red Sox scoreboard advertises a new service: if a fan feels his enjoyment of the game is being hindered by, say, drunk and rowdy fans nearby, he can, rather than wait for an usher to show up, call the security hotline on his phone. Not that I’m a fan of using the phone at games, but given that Wrigley Field ushers never seem to be around when drunks begin chucking peanuts at everyone in sight, I could imagine being able to phone security might be helpful. The trick would be avoiding getting a beer dumped on your head while you phoned.
8) And Johnny Damon got a couple of hits, stole a base, scored a run, made a couple of catches. And the Mike Timlin made another great appearance out of the Sox bullpen. And the Sox won, running me and Jim to 6-0 on the trip.
Labels: boston, brpa, Fenway Park, game report, johnny damon, red sox, road trip, tigers
Thursday, August 26, 2004
What You've All Been Waiting For: Two Johnny Damon Poems!
Johnny Damon, MVP
Johnny Damon, MVP
Who could e’er compete with thee?
Thy tresses steal the hearts of fans,
Thy beard surpasses any man’s.
Though sportswriters may disagree,
The cognoscenti are with me,
And ladies coast to coast can see:
You’re super-cute—you’re MVP!
The Hirsute Hero
Oh, Johnny Damon, when you walked,
Why did you not steal second?
And having stolen second, chalked
Up an easy steal of third--
With each advance your helmet flying
Off behind you in the dirt?
I worry that you’re just not trying,
Perhaps you fail to understand
Just why it is we show you love.
Here in this distant foreign land
We like your play, but way above
All else we love your beard and hair
Unfettered by your helm or hat,
Free-flowing, lovely, everywhere.
So, in the field, remember that
We want to see you run and dive
Your cap fly off, your hair set free
Its flowing tresses so alive.
And on the bases, don’t forget
Your fans are waiting patiently.
Whene’er the pitcher comes to set,
For you to take off instantly.
Steal second, third, and even home.
Run, run--that’s what we love you for!
We even promise not to moan,
If you’re thrown out--we’ll love you more!
stacey: levi, you've never written any poetry for me . . . is it because i don't have a beard?
Johnny Damon's Beard: Thank you very much.
Johnny Damon's Earlobes: Hey, what about me?
Johnny Damon, MVP
Who could e’er compete with thee?
Thy tresses steal the hearts of fans,
Thy beard surpasses any man’s.
Though sportswriters may disagree,
The cognoscenti are with me,
And ladies coast to coast can see:
You’re super-cute—you’re MVP!
The Hirsute Hero
Oh, Johnny Damon, when you walked,
Why did you not steal second?
And having stolen second, chalked
Up an easy steal of third--
With each advance your helmet flying
Off behind you in the dirt?
I worry that you’re just not trying,
Perhaps you fail to understand
Just why it is we show you love.
Here in this distant foreign land
We like your play, but way above
All else we love your beard and hair
Unfettered by your helm or hat,
Free-flowing, lovely, everywhere.
So, in the field, remember that
We want to see you run and dive
Your cap fly off, your hair set free
Its flowing tresses so alive.
And on the bases, don’t forget
Your fans are waiting patiently.
Whene’er the pitcher comes to set,
For you to take off instantly.
Steal second, third, and even home.
Run, run--that’s what we love you for!
We even promise not to moan,
If you’re thrown out--we’ll love you more!
Original comments...
stacey: levi, you've never written any poetry for me . . . is it because i don't have a beard?
Johnny Damon's Beard: Thank you very much.
Johnny Damon's Earlobes: Hey, what about me?
Labels: johnny damon, poetry
Monday, July 12, 2004
Halfway there
Well, we're more than halfway there. When I was a kid, the pedant in me (which was, like 75% of me) was regularly annoyed by the demarcation of the All-Star break as the halfway point. Now that I know what it's like to be an adult and once in a while need some days off, I understand better why three days off in the midst of a long season should be viewed as the halfway point, regardless of its mathematical accuracy.
So at the halfway point, it's time for a quick list of the best things about the first half for me:
1) The Cardinals, and their position in the standings relative to the Cubs, the Astros, and the rest of the Senior Circuit.
2) Johnny Damon's first at-bat of the season. Even more than the rest of his season, the spit-out-your-beer surprise of seeing him stand in that first night has made me smile for three months.
3) Scott Rolen
4) The Unit's perfect game.
5) The Tigers' win total, one less than at the end of last season. Do you think they'll just take the rest of the year off?
I'm sure I've missed some. For example, there's no way that the Tigers' season has been one of the five best things about baseball this year, even for Tigers fans. But I am impressed with their season, and I'm working, and listing Johnny Damon twice would be wrong.
So you should add your own top five in the comments. 'Cause yours will probably be better than mine.
Steve: 1) The Cubs are being the Cubs
2) The White Sox are making baseball fun (at least for me)
3) Baseball Related Program Activities
4) The NL East Race
5) Ivan Rodriguez (his stats are crazy when you consider he's a catcher. He hit .500 for the month of June)
Levi: .500?
That's insane.
Oh, and if I expanded my list, I might include:
6) The AL looking like it might, just might have a different order of finish for the first time since the birth of the Devil Rays. The teams have all finished in the same spots every season since then.
Dan: 1) Mets finally giving me a reason to enjoy the day-to-day pennant races again.
2) Traditionally shitty teams doing really well, in nearly every division: Tigers, Rays, Brewers, Padres, (erm, Mets), Rangers
3) Jason Marquis establishing himself as the best Jewish pitcher since Steve Stone
4) Mets sweeping the Yankees and winning the season series, both for the first time ever
5) The Astros imploding.
**6) Johnny Damon -- indeed, that first game was magic, and I was sitting here watching alone
2nd half wish list:
1) Mets sneak into the playoffs, I don't care if it's with an 82-80 record like it was in '73
2) Someone hits Clemens in the head (or hand)
3) Someone hits Jeter in the groin
4) Rickey Henderson returns
5) Andy Baggarly breaks open the BALCO case
Toby: 1. A Hoosier from Levi's sister's town leads the All-Star voting
2. Blue Jays' new logo/uniforms
3. Astros virtually out of the race
4. The Braves NOT in first place at the break
5. D-Rays' and PIrates' long winning streaks
Jason: 1. Finally getting to a Visalia Oaks game.
2. Finding a A&W Restaurant before the Oaks game.
3. Visiting PETCO park for a Padres-Cubs game.
4. Taking a pleasant weekday drive through the San Gabriel mountains before a Rancho Cucamonga Quakes game.
5. Watching Cal State Fullerton win the College World Series, giving me incentive to try to attend a game there next season.
Levi: How could I have forgotten the Braves' struggles? That really is a top-five event. Go, Mets!
So at the halfway point, it's time for a quick list of the best things about the first half for me:
1) The Cardinals, and their position in the standings relative to the Cubs, the Astros, and the rest of the Senior Circuit.
2) Johnny Damon's first at-bat of the season. Even more than the rest of his season, the spit-out-your-beer surprise of seeing him stand in that first night has made me smile for three months.
3) Scott Rolen
4) The Unit's perfect game.
5) The Tigers' win total, one less than at the end of last season. Do you think they'll just take the rest of the year off?
I'm sure I've missed some. For example, there's no way that the Tigers' season has been one of the five best things about baseball this year, even for Tigers fans. But I am impressed with their season, and I'm working, and listing Johnny Damon twice would be wrong.
So you should add your own top five in the comments. 'Cause yours will probably be better than mine.
Original comments...
Steve: 1) The Cubs are being the Cubs
2) The White Sox are making baseball fun (at least for me)
3) Baseball Related Program Activities
4) The NL East Race
5) Ivan Rodriguez (his stats are crazy when you consider he's a catcher. He hit .500 for the month of June)
Levi: .500?
That's insane.
Oh, and if I expanded my list, I might include:
6) The AL looking like it might, just might have a different order of finish for the first time since the birth of the Devil Rays. The teams have all finished in the same spots every season since then.
Dan: 1) Mets finally giving me a reason to enjoy the day-to-day pennant races again.
2) Traditionally shitty teams doing really well, in nearly every division: Tigers, Rays, Brewers, Padres, (erm, Mets), Rangers
3) Jason Marquis establishing himself as the best Jewish pitcher since Steve Stone
4) Mets sweeping the Yankees and winning the season series, both for the first time ever
5) The Astros imploding.
**6) Johnny Damon -- indeed, that first game was magic, and I was sitting here watching alone
2nd half wish list:
1) Mets sneak into the playoffs, I don't care if it's with an 82-80 record like it was in '73
2) Someone hits Clemens in the head (or hand)
3) Someone hits Jeter in the groin
4) Rickey Henderson returns
5) Andy Baggarly breaks open the BALCO case
Toby: 1. A Hoosier from Levi's sister's town leads the All-Star voting
2. Blue Jays' new logo/uniforms
3. Astros virtually out of the race
4. The Braves NOT in first place at the break
5. D-Rays' and PIrates' long winning streaks
Jason: 1. Finally getting to a Visalia Oaks game.
2. Finding a A&W Restaurant before the Oaks game.
3. Visiting PETCO park for a Padres-Cubs game.
4. Taking a pleasant weekday drive through the San Gabriel mountains before a Rancho Cucamonga Quakes game.
5. Watching Cal State Fullerton win the College World Series, giving me incentive to try to attend a game there next season.
Levi: How could I have forgotten the Braves' struggles? That really is a top-five event. Go, Mets!
Labels: Cardinals, johnny damon, randy johnson, scott rolen, tigers
Friday, July 09, 2004
That's my life
Two quick notes:
1) Reggie Sanders, in his online diary for today, says that during the break, he'll take his family out and do some fun things. But, he admits, "I will think about baseball on the off-day. That's my life. I would like not to think about it, but it's what I do, you know?"
Maybe MLB's "I live for this!" slogan isn't too far from the truth.
2) I can't link to it, because it's from a video clip, but Stacey alerted me to a wonderful photo on mlb.com
of Johnny Damon, hair everywhere, scoring the winning run in last night's Red Sox/A's game.
stacey: really, that photo was amazing enough that i've snagged it to share with our gentle readers. you can see it (in a probably not very legal way) here: GORGEOUS
Levi: I commented earlier to a coworker regarding the post about the kid having to leave early, "I'm kind of like a right-wing radio host with a tiny audience: I know what to throw them to get them all riled up."
That photo clearly belongs in that category, too.
Jason: Like Johnny Damon, I not too long ago had a lot of hair. And, like Johnny Damon, I have cut it. Unfortunately, I have no photographic proof to that fact, but believe me, it's true.
Or just look at a more recent photo of Johnny Damon. We're identical.
maura: and the headline that night? 'it gets hairy, but red sox win in 10th'
Dan: Was I the only one who really disliked Johnny Damon when he was with the Royals? He was so damn clean cut and seemed a bit snooty, even. Now, he friggin' rules.
I guess it could be I was the only one who paid attention to him at all.
thatbob: If I was the umpire I would call Johnny Damon safe as soon as his batting helmet leapt across home plate - a full second before Damon himself. Also, if I was his batting helmet, that would be cool!
Steve: I guess Dan can't vouch for this but I have had a full-blown man crush on Johnny Damon since the Royals days. He just seemed like the perfect ballplayer looks-wise. Now, if it was 1973 he would still look like the perfect ballplayer. Of course, in our postmodern times, its perfectly legitimate to argue that he is still the perfect ballplayer looks wise. PS-my all time favorite ballplayer looks-wise is John Kruk but I never had a man crush on him
Levi: And John Kruk has gotten all . . . boring, now that he's on ESPN. His suit is always clean, his tie is tied, his hair has that same mix of superglue and horse polish stuff in it that Jeff Brantley uses, and he never drinks a beer or eats a hot dog or talks about his missing ball on the air.
1) Reggie Sanders, in his online diary for today, says that during the break, he'll take his family out and do some fun things. But, he admits, "I will think about baseball on the off-day. That's my life. I would like not to think about it, but it's what I do, you know?"
Maybe MLB's "I live for this!" slogan isn't too far from the truth.
2) I can't link to it, because it's from a video clip, but Stacey alerted me to a wonderful photo on mlb.com
of Johnny Damon, hair everywhere, scoring the winning run in last night's Red Sox/A's game.
Original comments...
stacey: really, that photo was amazing enough that i've snagged it to share with our gentle readers. you can see it (in a probably not very legal way) here: GORGEOUS
Levi: I commented earlier to a coworker regarding the post about the kid having to leave early, "I'm kind of like a right-wing radio host with a tiny audience: I know what to throw them to get them all riled up."
That photo clearly belongs in that category, too.
Jason: Like Johnny Damon, I not too long ago had a lot of hair. And, like Johnny Damon, I have cut it. Unfortunately, I have no photographic proof to that fact, but believe me, it's true.
Or just look at a more recent photo of Johnny Damon. We're identical.
maura: and the headline that night? 'it gets hairy, but red sox win in 10th'
Dan: Was I the only one who really disliked Johnny Damon when he was with the Royals? He was so damn clean cut and seemed a bit snooty, even. Now, he friggin' rules.
I guess it could be I was the only one who paid attention to him at all.
thatbob: If I was the umpire I would call Johnny Damon safe as soon as his batting helmet leapt across home plate - a full second before Damon himself. Also, if I was his batting helmet, that would be cool!
Steve: I guess Dan can't vouch for this but I have had a full-blown man crush on Johnny Damon since the Royals days. He just seemed like the perfect ballplayer looks-wise. Now, if it was 1973 he would still look like the perfect ballplayer. Of course, in our postmodern times, its perfectly legitimate to argue that he is still the perfect ballplayer looks wise. PS-my all time favorite ballplayer looks-wise is John Kruk but I never had a man crush on him
Levi: And John Kruk has gotten all . . . boring, now that he's on ESPN. His suit is always clean, his tie is tied, his hair has that same mix of superglue and horse polish stuff in it that Jeff Brantley uses, and he never drinks a beer or eats a hot dog or talks about his missing ball on the air.
Labels: johnny damon, reggie sanders
Thursday, June 10, 2004
Non-baseball vacation. It's sad, but such things do exist.
Stacey and I are off on vacation with her family for a week, starting tomorrow. So I will be away from the Internet (Unless one of Stacey's sisters has one of those magic internet phone-watch-missile-defense-system-thingies, which would probably terrify me so much that I couldn't use it even if I wanted to do so.) and not posting to BRPA2004.
In my absence, I hope Jim will at least impersonate me for a post or two. It's not like it's that hard. You mention Johnny Damon, lament a Cardinals loss or cheer a Cardinals victory.
Or you could post something about Raul Mondesi--whose nickname is "The Buffalo"-- and Operation Shutdown: The Sequel, which he pulled in Pittsburgh, the home of the original, unmatchable Operation Shutdown.
And you could link to this silly picture, from the game where Mondesi, now an Angel, tore his quadriceps.
There. Now Jim will be able to impersonate me with ease. See you all when we return.
thatbob: I have no idea what you're talking about.
In my absence, I hope Jim will at least impersonate me for a post or two. It's not like it's that hard. You mention Johnny Damon, lament a Cardinals loss or cheer a Cardinals victory.
Or you could post something about Raul Mondesi--whose nickname is "The Buffalo"-- and Operation Shutdown: The Sequel, which he pulled in Pittsburgh, the home of the original, unmatchable Operation Shutdown.
And you could link to this silly picture, from the game where Mondesi, now an Angel, tore his quadriceps.
There. Now Jim will be able to impersonate me with ease. See you all when we return.
Original comments...
thatbob: I have no idea what you're talking about.
Labels: Cardinals, johnny damon, operation shutdown, raul mondesi
Tuesday, June 08, 2004
One of these things is not like the other
1) Damon claims in this article that it took him only three weeks to grow the beard. But then he goes on to say that he will have it back in about ten days. Maybe that means he's getting better with practice?
2) According to an article Stacey found, which I can't find right now, Damon's been shaving since he was six. That's what she says.
3) And just to leave you all warm and fuzzy, here are Damon's reasons for choosing tutoring program at the Boston Public Library and a city program, ReadBoston, as the beneficiaries of his charitable act:
"I didn't read well when I was young," said Damon. "They help kids do that. My parents were always working. I never had help on my homework, so it just related a lot with my life and me growing up. I think it just helps out everybody. It brings awareness and hopefully, they can get a lot more donations and help out a lot more kids, and that's what Boston's about. We have all these colleges here. We want to try to make each kid smart enough to go to these colleges.
"We're going to have even more 'smahtah' kids here in Boston."
You all know what to do.
4) In today's non-Damon note, I noticed something interesting that recent Cardinals call-up the Third Molina was doing last night while catching Chris Carpenter. In the late innings, as Carpenter tired and his pitches started to float up a bit, Molina began dropping his target all the way to the dirt. He'd set up, then hunker down and more or less lay the open glove in the dirt. The tactic seemed to work: Carpenter started aiming at the glove, and the pitches, when they didn't drop as much as they should have, ended up around the knees rather than around the belt. Does anyone know if this is a trick that Jose Molina or Bengie Molina uses?
Bengie Molina: I use that trick all the time. I also have the picture of a fly painted on the inside of my mitt, which the pitcher attempts to squash. It seems to help, unless a real fly lands on the end of the bat.
Levi: The real question, though, is how the hell a family produces three major leaguers at one position?
Were there no pitcher or shortstop genes in their family? Or did those all go to the gals?
sandor: Smart idea, Bengie. Been to Amsterdam lately?
Secho: What we do know is that Mr. and Mrs. Molina were pretty quick to get their groove back on after Bengie was born. His birthday is July 20, 1974, while Jose's is June 3, 1975. So they are, at this moment, both 29 years old, and not twins. So I guess itt's not too surprising that they share common talents and interests, though you would think one of them would've been pitching to the other one all those years.
Who were the last set of 3 brothers to play major league ball simultaneously? The Alous?
Levi: I think it's the Alous. The only other trios I can come up with off the top of my head are the DiMaggios and the Boyers. I know there have been at least a couple more.
I really like what I've seen of The Third Molina so far, although he does still look not quite ready for a full-time job in the majors.
stacey: did the third benes brother never make it out of the minors? they were all pitchers, i believe. maybe they grew up down the street from the molinas.
Luke: Pat Hughes and Dave Otto were discussing this during last night's game -- Ron Santo was taking the series off, so there was much more talk about actual baseball and much less about hairpieces, sweaters and funny names -- and they said there have been 19 sets of brothers, the most recent being Jose, Hector and Tommy in 1977. Here's a complete list.
Cluke: And I think it goes without saying that the awards for best names go to Clete, Cloynd and Ken Boyer.
Cloyd!
2) According to an article Stacey found, which I can't find right now, Damon's been shaving since he was six. That's what she says.
3) And just to leave you all warm and fuzzy, here are Damon's reasons for choosing tutoring program at the Boston Public Library and a city program, ReadBoston, as the beneficiaries of his charitable act:
"I didn't read well when I was young," said Damon. "They help kids do that. My parents were always working. I never had help on my homework, so it just related a lot with my life and me growing up. I think it just helps out everybody. It brings awareness and hopefully, they can get a lot more donations and help out a lot more kids, and that's what Boston's about. We have all these colleges here. We want to try to make each kid smart enough to go to these colleges.
"We're going to have even more 'smahtah' kids here in Boston."
You all know what to do.
4) In today's non-Damon note, I noticed something interesting that recent Cardinals call-up the Third Molina was doing last night while catching Chris Carpenter. In the late innings, as Carpenter tired and his pitches started to float up a bit, Molina began dropping his target all the way to the dirt. He'd set up, then hunker down and more or less lay the open glove in the dirt. The tactic seemed to work: Carpenter started aiming at the glove, and the pitches, when they didn't drop as much as they should have, ended up around the knees rather than around the belt. Does anyone know if this is a trick that Jose Molina or Bengie Molina uses?
Original comments:
Bengie Molina: I use that trick all the time. I also have the picture of a fly painted on the inside of my mitt, which the pitcher attempts to squash. It seems to help, unless a real fly lands on the end of the bat.
Levi: The real question, though, is how the hell a family produces three major leaguers at one position?
Were there no pitcher or shortstop genes in their family? Or did those all go to the gals?
sandor: Smart idea, Bengie. Been to Amsterdam lately?
Secho: What we do know is that Mr. and Mrs. Molina were pretty quick to get their groove back on after Bengie was born. His birthday is July 20, 1974, while Jose's is June 3, 1975. So they are, at this moment, both 29 years old, and not twins. So I guess itt's not too surprising that they share common talents and interests, though you would think one of them would've been pitching to the other one all those years.
Who were the last set of 3 brothers to play major league ball simultaneously? The Alous?
Levi: I think it's the Alous. The only other trios I can come up with off the top of my head are the DiMaggios and the Boyers. I know there have been at least a couple more.
I really like what I've seen of The Third Molina so far, although he does still look not quite ready for a full-time job in the majors.
stacey: did the third benes brother never make it out of the minors? they were all pitchers, i believe. maybe they grew up down the street from the molinas.
Luke: Pat Hughes and Dave Otto were discussing this during last night's game -- Ron Santo was taking the series off, so there was much more talk about actual baseball and much less about hairpieces, sweaters and funny names -- and they said there have been 19 sets of brothers, the most recent being Jose, Hector and Tommy in 1977. Here's a complete list.
Cluke: And I think it goes without saying that the awards for best names go to Clete, Cloynd and Ken Boyer.
Cloyd!
Labels: chris carpenter, johnny damon, yadier molina
Thursday, June 03, 2004
Look what looks can do
In the early balloting for the starting outfield for the American League All-Star team, Baseball-Related Program Activities 2004 favorite Johnny Damon is a strong third.
Now, much as I hate to admit it, Johnny Damon is definitely not the third-best outfielder in the American League.
While he was on the All-Star team in 2002, he has never come close to being voted to a starting berth. And it's not like he's off to an extremely good start this season. His .282/383./400 line is perfectly acceptable, but it's not like he's setting the world on fire.
Not with his bat, that is. We all know why Johnny Damon might make the All-Star team: Who doesn't want to have the coolest-looking player in baseball representing the American League at baseball's coolest position? Well, aside from a few silly Yankees fans, that is. Even without the beard, he deserves the starting nod.
Internet voting is allowed. Vote early and often, and this might be the best All-Star game since the one Bud Selig ruined--which happens to be the one in which Johnny Damon went 1-3.
maura: you can only vote up to 25 times! so don't vote too often, there.
Jim: I punched out a lot of all-star ballots for Johnny Damon, among others, at the Devil Rays-Rangers game (because my father dumped a bunch of them in my lap, and there was nothing else to do). No wonder he's running third!
Steve: this is only partially related but on Wed night, Vladimir Guerrero (leading AL outfield vote getter) had 9 RBI in a game. I looked around a bit for the single game record to no avail. Jim? Levi?
Jim: According to the chart that was in Thursday's L.A. Times, the record is 12, held by both Jim Bottomley of the Cardinals (who did it on September 16, 1924) and Mark Whiten of the Cardinals (September 7, 1993). The A.L. record is 11, held by Tony Lazzeri of the Yankees (May 24, 1936).
Levi: I was listening to the Mark Whiten game. It was something.
His feat is impressive because he drove in all 12 on home runs. Four of them.
Secho: I was thinking Whiten was probably the worst player ever to hit 4 HRs in a game (and this is a category that includes Mike Cameron); despite hitting 25 homers and driving in 99 in 1993, Whiten had only a .746 OPS. How do you drive in 99 while slugging .423? Hell, even Kevin Elster slugged .462 when he inexplicably drove in 99 runs. Okay, Johnny Damon's only slugging .416 with 31 RBI, but I'll grow a mullet if he's sitting at 100 RBI with his current line at the end of the season.
Anyway, I thought Whiten was the worst 4-homer player unil I stumbled upon Pat Seerey, who did it for the White Sox in 1948. He was a career .224 hitter who only played 4 games in 1949 before being cut and never played again. This after leading the Sox with 18 homers and 64 RBI in 1948. Even Seerey had a .768 OPS that season, though, so I may be switching my vote back to Whiten.
Levi: Whiten really was a bad hitter, a mistake hitter who would flash such impressive power on those few bad pitches he hammered that he'd have you scratching your head.
Whiten somehow only hit 13 doubles in 1993, which goes a long way (with his lousy batting average) to explaining his low slugging percentage. And the RBI were (Here's where I wish Dan Rivkin was reading this blog regularly), I'm guessing, about 40% Gregg Jeffries (.342/.408/.485), 20% Ray Lankford (.238/.366./.346), 20% Bernard Gilkey (.305/.370/.481). God knows where the other 20% came from.
Oh, and Jim Bottomley was known as Sunny Jim Bottomley.
Now, much as I hate to admit it, Johnny Damon is definitely not the third-best outfielder in the American League.
While he was on the All-Star team in 2002, he has never come close to being voted to a starting berth. And it's not like he's off to an extremely good start this season. His .282/383./400 line is perfectly acceptable, but it's not like he's setting the world on fire.
Not with his bat, that is. We all know why Johnny Damon might make the All-Star team: Who doesn't want to have the coolest-looking player in baseball representing the American League at baseball's coolest position? Well, aside from a few silly Yankees fans, that is. Even without the beard, he deserves the starting nod.
Internet voting is allowed. Vote early and often, and this might be the best All-Star game since the one Bud Selig ruined--which happens to be the one in which Johnny Damon went 1-3.
Original comments...
maura: you can only vote up to 25 times! so don't vote too often, there.
Jim: I punched out a lot of all-star ballots for Johnny Damon, among others, at the Devil Rays-Rangers game (because my father dumped a bunch of them in my lap, and there was nothing else to do). No wonder he's running third!
Steve: this is only partially related but on Wed night, Vladimir Guerrero (leading AL outfield vote getter) had 9 RBI in a game. I looked around a bit for the single game record to no avail. Jim? Levi?
Jim: According to the chart that was in Thursday's L.A. Times, the record is 12, held by both Jim Bottomley of the Cardinals (who did it on September 16, 1924) and Mark Whiten of the Cardinals (September 7, 1993). The A.L. record is 11, held by Tony Lazzeri of the Yankees (May 24, 1936).
Levi: I was listening to the Mark Whiten game. It was something.
His feat is impressive because he drove in all 12 on home runs. Four of them.
Secho: I was thinking Whiten was probably the worst player ever to hit 4 HRs in a game (and this is a category that includes Mike Cameron); despite hitting 25 homers and driving in 99 in 1993, Whiten had only a .746 OPS. How do you drive in 99 while slugging .423? Hell, even Kevin Elster slugged .462 when he inexplicably drove in 99 runs. Okay, Johnny Damon's only slugging .416 with 31 RBI, but I'll grow a mullet if he's sitting at 100 RBI with his current line at the end of the season.
Anyway, I thought Whiten was the worst 4-homer player unil I stumbled upon Pat Seerey, who did it for the White Sox in 1948. He was a career .224 hitter who only played 4 games in 1949 before being cut and never played again. This after leading the Sox with 18 homers and 64 RBI in 1948. Even Seerey had a .768 OPS that season, though, so I may be switching my vote back to Whiten.
Levi: Whiten really was a bad hitter, a mistake hitter who would flash such impressive power on those few bad pitches he hammered that he'd have you scratching your head.
Whiten somehow only hit 13 doubles in 1993, which goes a long way (with his lousy batting average) to explaining his low slugging percentage. And the RBI were (Here's where I wish Dan Rivkin was reading this blog regularly), I'm guessing, about 40% Gregg Jeffries (.342/.408/.485), 20% Ray Lankford (.238/.366./.346), 20% Bernard Gilkey (.305/.370/.481). God knows where the other 20% came from.
Oh, and Jim Bottomley was known as Sunny Jim Bottomley.
Labels: johnny damon
Tuesday, May 11, 2004
Nothing gold can stay
Enjoy it while you can, folks. The Boston Herald is reporting the following:
"Johnny Damon has agreed to shave his beard May 21 as part of a charity venture, but he's not going to shear his long locks of hair. The center fielder, who has 3-for-4 last night and has raised his average to .283, agreed to shave when Gillette offered to contribute $15,000 to Boston Public Library."
According to an AP story, Gillette asked Damon to pick a charity.
I guess if the beard is gonna go, might as well help support a library.
Oh, and in today's search for Damon photos, I found a forum on beards with a thread on new baseball facial hair this season. But please don't let it distract you so much that you never return here.
sandor: Damon's mom will be happy. Apparently she thinks he's no longer as cute as he used to be.
Levi: Maybe shaving is a Mother's Day gift?
Luke: If only I were a rich eccentric, because then I'd offer $15,001 to charity for him to *NOT* shave it.
"Johnny Damon has agreed to shave his beard May 21 as part of a charity venture, but he's not going to shear his long locks of hair. The center fielder, who has 3-for-4 last night and has raised his average to .283, agreed to shave when Gillette offered to contribute $15,000 to Boston Public Library."
According to an AP story, Gillette asked Damon to pick a charity.
I guess if the beard is gonna go, might as well help support a library.
Oh, and in today's search for Damon photos, I found a forum on beards with a thread on new baseball facial hair this season. But please don't let it distract you so much that you never return here.
Original comments...
sandor: Damon's mom will be happy. Apparently she thinks he's no longer as cute as he used to be.
Levi: Maybe shaving is a Mother's Day gift?
Luke: If only I were a rich eccentric, because then I'd offer $15,001 to charity for him to *NOT* shave it.
Labels: johnny damon
Monday, May 03, 2004
Those wacky Texans
Sandy passes along this Johnny Damon-related photo.
Levi: Damon's hair and beard were all over the ESPN Sunday night game last night. Our TV was trembling, it was so excited.
Original comments...
Levi: Damon's hair and beard were all over the ESPN Sunday night game last night. Our TV was trembling, it was so excited.
Labels: johnny damon
Friday, April 23, 2004
Bowing to public demand
Wednesday, April 07, 2004
Wow, Jim. Thanks for passing along Johnny Damon's statement about his hair being, in part, an attempt to do everything the opposite of the Yankees. That is just about the only thing that could possibly make his hair and beard better. Well, other than them, say, defeating President Bush or leading efforts for world peace.
And I forgot--one more good Damon note before I move on to whatever exciting baseball news happens today. During Sunday night's game, about two-thirds of the way through the game, ESPN dug up a photo of Damon from when we last saw him. They placed it side-by-side with a new photo from that day. The entire audience at the Rocketship gasped. As the noise died away, Jon Miller's voice cut through, saying, "How do we even know that's Johnny Damon out there?" It got a good laugh.
Which ties in with an idea I've had for a long time: say you're the Cardinals. You're playing a big game against the Cubs, and you're down by a run with two guys on in the bottom of the ninth. You've got So Taguchi coming up. People start heading for the exits.
But you've got Albert Pujols on the bench. He's even got a bat in his hands, because, well, that's how he is. Why not put Pujols in Taguchi's jersey and send him to the plate as Taguchi? Sure, he's not Taguchi. Everyone knows he's not Taguchi. But he and the manager and the rest of the team swear up and down that without a doubt, swear on Tony LaRussa's Pure Beef Heart, he's So Taguchi.
What's the umpire going to do? Obviously, he'll have no choice but to let him bat. I'm picturing buttons popping off a way-too-tight jersey as Pujols/Taguchi hits the ball into the Mississippi. Think how much the hometown crowd will get into this! Sure, the opposing team will lodge a protest, but I don't think the Basic Agreement allows for DNA testing. Barring that, who can be certain that the hitter who won the game for the Cardinals wasn't Taguchi? David Hume and Bishop Berkeley would be with me on this, guaranteed. Certainty is impossible.
Clearly, the keys to the success of this strategy are three. 1) Have Albert Pujols on your team. 2) Make sure that everyone involved--from LaRussa on down--absolutely refuses to budge in their certainty that this hitter is So Taguchi. 3) Don't have any of those problematically honest born-again Christians on the team.
If you were really serious--and commensurately willing to be impressively offensive--you could even put Pujols in bad makeup to make him look Japanese. Like Mickey Rooney, only worse.
thatbob: Actually, I think the born-again Christians would be very open to the uncertainty argument. If I was Tony LaRussa, I would say: "Although you think you just watched Pujols put on Taguchi's jersey, isn't it possible that this illusion was created by a miracle of God? Or that, by a miracle of God, Pujols is now Taguchi? Or do you deny the possibility of miracles, and claim to know the mind of God? Now since you can't claim with certainty that Taguchi is Pujols, I would ask that, for the sake of the team, you hold your tongue on the matter."
See, this is why I would have made such an excellent Jesuit. Is it too late for seminary?
And I forgot--one more good Damon note before I move on to whatever exciting baseball news happens today. During Sunday night's game, about two-thirds of the way through the game, ESPN dug up a photo of Damon from when we last saw him. They placed it side-by-side with a new photo from that day. The entire audience at the Rocketship gasped. As the noise died away, Jon Miller's voice cut through, saying, "How do we even know that's Johnny Damon out there?" It got a good laugh.
Which ties in with an idea I've had for a long time: say you're the Cardinals. You're playing a big game against the Cubs, and you're down by a run with two guys on in the bottom of the ninth. You've got So Taguchi coming up. People start heading for the exits.
But you've got Albert Pujols on the bench. He's even got a bat in his hands, because, well, that's how he is. Why not put Pujols in Taguchi's jersey and send him to the plate as Taguchi? Sure, he's not Taguchi. Everyone knows he's not Taguchi. But he and the manager and the rest of the team swear up and down that without a doubt, swear on Tony LaRussa's Pure Beef Heart, he's So Taguchi.
What's the umpire going to do? Obviously, he'll have no choice but to let him bat. I'm picturing buttons popping off a way-too-tight jersey as Pujols/Taguchi hits the ball into the Mississippi. Think how much the hometown crowd will get into this! Sure, the opposing team will lodge a protest, but I don't think the Basic Agreement allows for DNA testing. Barring that, who can be certain that the hitter who won the game for the Cardinals wasn't Taguchi? David Hume and Bishop Berkeley would be with me on this, guaranteed. Certainty is impossible.
Clearly, the keys to the success of this strategy are three. 1) Have Albert Pujols on your team. 2) Make sure that everyone involved--from LaRussa on down--absolutely refuses to budge in their certainty that this hitter is So Taguchi. 3) Don't have any of those problematically honest born-again Christians on the team.
If you were really serious--and commensurately willing to be impressively offensive--you could even put Pujols in bad makeup to make him look Japanese. Like Mickey Rooney, only worse.
Original comments...
thatbob: Actually, I think the born-again Christians would be very open to the uncertainty argument. If I was Tony LaRussa, I would say: "Although you think you just watched Pujols put on Taguchi's jersey, isn't it possible that this illusion was created by a miracle of God? Or that, by a miracle of God, Pujols is now Taguchi? Or do you deny the possibility of miracles, and claim to know the mind of God? Now since you can't claim with certainty that Taguchi is Pujols, I would ask that, for the sake of the team, you hold your tongue on the matter."
See, this is why I would have made such an excellent Jesuit. Is it too late for seminary?
Labels: Albert Pujols, johnny damon, so taguchi
Tuesday, April 06, 2004
No wonder they won five Pulitzers
Levi, you may be pleased to note that Johnny Damon made the L.A. Times sports section's daily "Quotebook" feature at the upper left of page D2, complete with photo. To quote the quote: "'[General Manager] Theo [Epstein] told me I can keep it. I don't think we want to compare ourselves to the Yankees. We'll do everything the opposite of what they do.' -- Johnny Damon, Boston Red Sox outfielder, on his long hair and beard, which is not allowed by Yankee management"
In other news, the location of this blog will be moving soon. More details later.
In other news, the location of this blog will be moving soon. More details later.
Labels: admin, johnny damon, los angeles times
Luke had a good thought about Johnny Damon: maybe he's about to re-form the House of David traveling team. That would make this the best season in seventy-five years or so.
Other Opening Day notes, from someone who was stuck at work and couldn't have watched the Cardinals anyway:
1) The Detroit Tigers are above .500 for the first time since April 8, 2001. And, as Stacey noticed that Ron Santo won the attendance game on the Cubs broadcast on WGN, so is Ron, although the drought has probably been longer.
2) The Astros are in last place. But so are the Cardinals. Maybe it's best that, as Wittgenstein used to suggest whenever his favorite team lost a big game, we should just pass over that in silence.
3) Johnny Damon's hair is still the story of the day. If I had a newspaper, the headline today would be "Opening Day features thrillings comebacks." But the subhead would be "Johnny Damon's hair, beard have no comment on Jimy Williams's decision to pitch to Bonds."
4) Even Bush and Cheney throwing out pitches couldn't ruin Opening Day. It's good to know there's something in the world they can't destroy. I suppose I should keep quiet about that, or else next year they'll try harder.
Other Opening Day notes, from someone who was stuck at work and couldn't have watched the Cardinals anyway:
1) The Detroit Tigers are above .500 for the first time since April 8, 2001. And, as Stacey noticed that Ron Santo won the attendance game on the Cubs broadcast on WGN, so is Ron, although the drought has probably been longer.
2) The Astros are in last place. But so are the Cardinals. Maybe it's best that, as Wittgenstein used to suggest whenever his favorite team lost a big game, we should just pass over that in silence.
3) Johnny Damon's hair is still the story of the day. If I had a newspaper, the headline today would be "Opening Day features thrillings comebacks." But the subhead would be "Johnny Damon's hair, beard have no comment on Jimy Williams's decision to pitch to Bonds."
4) Even Bush and Cheney throwing out pitches couldn't ruin Opening Day. It's good to know there's something in the world they can't destroy. I suppose I should keep quiet about that, or else next year they'll try harder.
Labels: johnny damon, luke seemann, ron santo
Monday, April 05, 2004
Wow. Also, wow. In conclusion, wow. (I didn't watch the Sunday night game because I was cleansing my palate for today's action, which starts in an hour and 25 minutes.)
Labels: johnny damon
I may have a new favorite non-Cardinal player.
Last night, we had a couple of people over to watch the opener between the Red Sox and the Orioles. We settled in, started the TiVo, and the first image of the season caused everyone to gasp in sheer, unadulterated awe. Johnny Damon, over the winter, turned into a god. He grew out his already shaggy hair so that it hangs over his shoulders, trailing out of his batting helmet or cap. And he grew a beard. It was hard to concentrate on what he was doing during his first at-bat, because all anyone in the room could look at or think about was all that hair. Then, on his first play in the outfield, he was coming in for a ball, not too fast, and it looked like there was no hope of his cap falling off. Everyone was disappointed. Then, like a silent prayer being answered, the cap popped off his head and his glossy locks floated free. There was much cheering in the Rocketship.
I apologize for not having a link to a photo. I haven't seen one today, which just tells me, once again, that the majority of sportswriters have been doing their jobs so long that they no longer really love sports. Otherwise, today's headlines would be along the lines of: Damon's Hair, Beard Open a Glorious Season.
You know it's going to be a great year now.
P.S. While looking up links for this post, I discovered that the Baltimore Orioles own neither www.baltimoreorioles.com or www.orioles.com. The latter hosts a site for the United States Beer Drinking Team, with a link for Beer Radio.
Last night, we had a couple of people over to watch the opener between the Red Sox and the Orioles. We settled in, started the TiVo, and the first image of the season caused everyone to gasp in sheer, unadulterated awe. Johnny Damon, over the winter, turned into a god. He grew out his already shaggy hair so that it hangs over his shoulders, trailing out of his batting helmet or cap. And he grew a beard. It was hard to concentrate on what he was doing during his first at-bat, because all anyone in the room could look at or think about was all that hair. Then, on his first play in the outfield, he was coming in for a ball, not too fast, and it looked like there was no hope of his cap falling off. Everyone was disappointed. Then, like a silent prayer being answered, the cap popped off his head and his glossy locks floated free. There was much cheering in the Rocketship.
I apologize for not having a link to a photo. I haven't seen one today, which just tells me, once again, that the majority of sportswriters have been doing their jobs so long that they no longer really love sports. Otherwise, today's headlines would be along the lines of: Damon's Hair, Beard Open a Glorious Season.
You know it's going to be a great year now.
P.S. While looking up links for this post, I discovered that the Baltimore Orioles own neither www.baltimoreorioles.com or www.orioles.com. The latter hosts a site for the United States Beer Drinking Team, with a link for Beer Radio.
Labels: johnny damon, red sox
