Mascot watch

We knew the Red Sox had a mascot named Wally

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the Green Monster — but it turns out they also have…well, see for yourself.

Define "control"

Have you all seen this? It’s a clip of Joe Mikulik, manager of the Rockies’ single-A affiliate, the Asheville Tourists, throwing what might be the best managerial tantrum I’ve ever seen. It happened while I was on vacation, and the first I heard of it was this story in USA Today, which is worth reading even after you see the video, if only because it’s fun to see all the various protest actions Mikulik chooses to take listed one after another.

Near the end of the article, Mikulik, despite apologizing, says, “I never lost control, though it looked like I did. I thought I was in total control the whole time.”

P.S. Thanks, YouTube. You’re the best.

The jingle Levi’s been waiting for (maybe)

This is from KWK radio in St. Louis in the late 1950s or early 1960s, and you

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Jeff and Bil Keane, baseball strategists

Credit for the Dodgers’ win over the Diamondbacks last night is

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being given to the fact that Nomar Garciaparra got hit by three pitches (with Russell Martin getting hit once for good measure). Guess they shouldn’t have dodged!

Other comic-strip strategies to be adopted soon by the Dodgers include the “Cathy” strategy (annoy the other team by continually asking, “Do I look fat in this uniform?”), the “Sally Forth” strategy (psych out the other team by keeping a smug expression on your face no matter what), and the “Mallard Fillmore” strategy (“Oh, sorry, I was just waiting for the howls of protest from all the Hollywood liberals in the crowd here at Dodger Stadium”).

Only the finest in baseball-related jokes

Turns out that if you have high-definition TV, the picture clarity is such that you can see pain lines and pain stars. However, it looks like it’s hard to keep the colors in balance on these old-timey woodgrain-cabinet HDTVs: the blue on the Dodgers uniform looks black, and Dodger Stadium and the denizens thereof look green. Actually, with those vertical posts visible in the stands, it looks more like Fenway Park.

In other news, please note that on May 11th, I correctly predicted that Scott Kazmir would be the Devil Rays’ sole All-Star Game representative.