The best episode of "Clubhouse" ever

Hanger-on Sandy passed along this story. It seems that Kris Benson’s wife Anna has already thought through what she’s going to do if he cheats on her. I can’t speak for the married half of, but as far as the single half is concerned, this is the first time being a Mets batboy has ever seemed like a good idea.

This is Anna Benson. (Don’t worry, the picture is reasonably safe for work.)

Now, what about Mrs. Jose Lima?

Original comments…

Dan: I should have passed this story along earlier.. The Stern interview was about two weeks ago. She’s insane, and now with Pedro on board, his little friend is fair game. Among other people, I believe, who shall remain nameless.

I’ve already wanted to float the Mets clubhouse reality show — between her, Pedro and accompanying midget, Mike Piazza and his debated sexuality… I WANT Sammy here, not even to play but to add to the comedy.

Levi: Hmm. The timing on this story does make me wonder about Pedro’s motives for becoming a Met.

maura: i’d probably steer clear of mrs. lima for now…

Jim: Not to mention steering clear of the entire Dominican Republic!

Dominican Republic: That’s not fair, Jim. We don’t all have herpes.

Haiti: Well, don’t try to blame us!

Oh, say can you see?

As Jim and I are always saying to each other, here at Baseball-Related Program Activites 2004, we’re nothing if not a family site. We’re like those sportswriters who are always lamenting about ballplayers not signing autographs or building childrens’ hospitals or fighting crime. We want the whole family involved in the game. We’re even thinking of making our site play the Baha Men.

So when my friend Jon Solomon sent me a photo of Dodgers pitcher Jose Lima singing “The Star-Spangled Banner” at Dodger Stadium last week, his wife and son by his side, I thought, “This little bit of Lima Time is perfect for Baseball-Related Program Activities 2004! A patriotic family photo!”

Then I looked at the photo. And I have to admit that it took me a moment to focus on Francis Scott Key’s view of the battle for Fort McHenry. After a few minutes, I decided that the people who run the site the photo was located on weren’t including it because of Jose’s singing or their love of country. Nor was that the case on another site, on which there’s even a rude poll relating to one aspect (two aspects?) of the photo.

But I want you all to be clear that, as we are a family site, I bring this photo to your attention for the same reason that I’m sure Jon brought it to mine: we think it’s pretty cool that Jose Lima got to sing “The Star-Spangled Banner.”

Here at Baseball-Related Program Activities 2004, we–we take the road less traveled by. For the kids.

Original comments…

Levi: Oh, and last night, the woman who sang the National Anthem at Wrigley Field sang “For the ramparts we watched.” I guess that’s the opium-addled version, where the ramparts are streaming.

Jim: I’m not sure if Pax TV deserves to be the link for “a family site.” Their Tampa affiliate is the broadcast home of the Devil Rays. (Yes, the Devil Rays really are bad enough that independent station “More TV 32” — the equivalent of Channel 26, “The U,” in Chicago — which broadcast their games for the first few years didn’t want to renew the broadcast rights, and apparently, nobody else wanted them either.)

toby: Just more proof–as I once discussed with Levi a long time ago–that EVERY single pro baseball player has a gorgeous wife. Do you remember Zane Smith of the Expos/Braves/Pirates.. Even he had a hot wife.

Levi: Jim reports that the phrase “Jose Lima’s wife” has now passed “Johnny Damon’s hair and beard” as the most common Google search that has led people to our site. I should have seen that coming.

Anonymous: Jim is correct