Cardinals championship ruins joke

In 1996, I sent Levi a condolence card after the National League Championship Series, in which the Braves came back from being down 3 games to 1 to the Cardinals (including a 14-0 win at Busch Stadium in Game 5).

In 2004, I sent Levi a condolence card after the

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Red Sox swept the Cardinals in the World Series.

This year, if the Rangers had won in Game 6 or Game 7, what I would have sent Levi is some random sort of greeting card — perhaps a My Little Pony birthday card that would normally be intended for a 5-year-old girl — and writing in it, “I asked my friend Tony La Russa to call and order a condolence card.”

Of course, I don’t think Levi necessarily minds that he didn’t get to fully enjoy that joke.

Opening Day 2007: Hour 10

7:00Texas Rangers at Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim (FSN West)
7:01 — Someone runs onto the field at the Metrodome. I understand why they don’t show the action on TV, but the fact that they’re not showing it just makes me want to watch it even more (and because all the shots of the players standing around doing nothing are really, really boring).
7:09 — After a little trouble in the top of the 9th, the Twins win.
7:10 — With all of the Sammy Sosa excitement, I didn’t realize that Kenny Lofton was on the Rangers this year, and that he’s at 599 career steals.
7:12 — He gets number 600. There has been a noticeable amount of first-inning steals today — managers trying to set an aggressive tone for the season, obviously.
7:17 — Boneless Buffalo wings at Carl’s Jr.? I’m going to guess that the “wings” portion of the name is not quite accurate.
7:22 — Vladimir Guerrero’s batting helmet is already filthy. How does he do it?
7:31 — While the Angels announcers aren’t paying attention because they’re interviewing Troy Percival in the booth, Sammy Sosa strikes out. They don’t even get a closeup of him before he bats, just as he walks back to the Rangers dugout hanging his head.

7:35 — End of the Rangers’ half of the 2nd. I’ve been watching baseball for over nine and a half hours now. I think that’s all I can handle for today.

What? More baseball?

While we’re waiting for Levi to regale us with tales of cute, furry kittens insinuating his dreams, here are some pictures from the two baseball games I went to over the past few days. Jason had some Dodgers vouchers to use up before the end of the season, so he, Cathryn, and I went to the Dodgers-Padres game last Thursday…

The colored seats at Dodger Stadium, a picture taken because who knows when they’re going to decide to put in new chairs?…

This is the right-field pavilion, which I guess we could have bought all the seats in, but didn’t think of it before the beginning of the season the way some people did…

Jason had a big bowl of nachos and a big drink…

The final line (the Dodgers didn’t do much)…

Slightly less blurry, the final score…

An artistic shot of the Los Angeles skyline on the way out…

Sunset Boulevard: not just a movie starring Gloria Swanson, it’s also a Dodger Stadium parking lot exit…

Three days later, Jason and I went to Angel Stadium of Anaheim, or whatever it’s really called now, to see the Angels play the Rangers.

Jason wanted to say hi to the mummified body of Gene Autry…

Then he had another big bowl of nachos (I assume that’s sour cream on top and not icing)…

And a soda in a magical color-changing plastic cup (red, or at least pink, when full; clear when empty)…

During the game, a train stopped at the Anaheim station, across the parking lot. Unfortunately, the Amtrak schedule is not well-suited for taking train trips to Angels games…

Not only can you see trains from the stadium, you can also see the Matterhorn at Disneyland, which I’ve pointed out with the red arrow in this picture…

Yes, the Angels have some retired numbers…

They also have some fake rocks and real water…

The end of the rows of seats have an Angels logo on a raised baseball-diamond shape. They’re covering what’s actually molded into the seats: an Edison International logo on a baseball diamond…

Now that they’re not owned by Disney anymore, the Angels are free to get some other family entertainment spots as their sponsors…

And other family-oriented sponsors…

They still make some of the ushers go out on the field for the seventh-inning stretch, but now they have to take off their straw hats for “God Bless America”…

And put their hats back on for “Take Me Out to the Ball Game” (which, at this game, was sung by the same woman who had just done “God Bless America,” I guess because they figured as long as she was on the field with a microphone, she might as well)…

Meanwhile, during most of this, Rangers rookie pitcher Chris Young was on the mound being tall…

Which means it was time to break out, yes, the Rally Monkey!…

Didn’t work, and what is probably my last game of the season ends just as my first game of the season did, with a win by the visiting Texas Rangers…

Original comments…

Jon Solomon: Chris Young is a friend of mine from when he played basketball (and baseball) at Princeton. I got to go to Fenway as a member of “the media” a few weeks ago to cover his first MLB win. They let me go on the field, in the locker room and everything. What were the Red Sox thinking? I’ve got an interview with Chris from after the game up on princetonbasketball.com. If you want a password to listen, just let me know.

Jason: I suggested stopping by the Hooters of Anaheim after the game. However, Jim declined, since he was TiVo-ing the Bucs-Seahawks game and didn’t want to know the score.

But when I got home, I did drink a quart of Jack Daniels.

Jim: Hmm, what a coincidence. But in my case, I needed it to help me forget the Bucs-Seahawks game.

Raised on Devil Ray-dio

First and most importantly, I have solved a mystery that has been puzzling Levi ever since last July, regarding the end of a certain White Sox-Devil Rays game, captured by Levi’s TiVo and replayed endlessly. The question was, what was the deal with the Devil Rays mascot, Pansy the Wuss-Wuss Fish Who Can’t Keep It Up (a.k.a. Raymond), when he was jumping around with the players?

The answer is that if the Rays are behind, he spends the bottom of the ninth standing around on top of the visitors’ dugout, dressed in a black shirt and mask, “disguised” as Rally Ray. Unfortunately, I was unable to get a good picture of him as he was unsuccessfully attempting to work his mojo against the Rangers on Tuesday night:

And now, more pictures:


Tropicana Field, as seen from the Interstate. It’s hard to tell, but we were driving through a sudden, very brief cloudburst at this point, approximately 6:40 P.M., and that’s why the city of St. Petersburg built a dome in the late 1980s.


The view from my seat, on the club level. I have to admit that this would be a very nice stadium if not for the permanent roof.


Plenty of good seats available. The official attendance was 10,389, but there were probably fewer than 7,000 people actually at the game. This is what happens when a team has lost its last five games and 12 out of its last 14, and plays a Tuesday night game against a team other than the Yankees or Red Sox, and doesn’t give away some sort of promotional item. They did not play Guess the Attendance on the scoreboard.


Maura’s favorite player!


The final line.


Headline in the Tampa Tribune.


Headline in the Dallas Morning News (it was a coincidence that I was changing planes not too far away from The Ballpark at Arlington…excuse me, Ameriquest Field).


Unfortunately, although the Lowry Park Zoo in Tampa has a “please touch” ray pond, since they’re all the rage these days, they haven’t labeled which ones are the devil rays. (Insert your own joke here, or better yet, in the comments.)

Original comments…

maura: haha, i was totally going to ask you where the picture of rocco was!! nice work, my friend, nice work. have you been to other roofed parks ever? i have never seen a baseball game indoors, and man people i know sure hate tropicana field.

maura: i am really sad about the rays this season, too, but i think i’ve mentioned that. sigh

Levi: I’ve been to a game at the Metrodome, with Stacey and Sarah Meisch and Dan Rivkin and Baggarly. We all kind of enjoyed it, although it was weird. The worst part was leaving a 65-degree sunny day to enter a 65-degree fluorescent-lit dome.

Steve: As much as I’m glad Jim was able to enjoy a trip home, (and catch an AL game in a dome) his attention to detail makes a strong case that baseball could use some contraction.

Jim: Nah, I’d have the same attention to detail even if the AL still had only eight teams. But it’ll all be worth it if I get on “Super Millionaire.”

Steve: I hear you on that super millionare. Will you be my phone a friend if I make it? I don’t like the new “jury” lifeline. Even though they should be super brainy, I don’t trust them. They are there at the producers behest no?