11. Intestinal parasites!

The new issue of Sports Illustrated contains an article titled “10 Reasons Why Baseball Is Awesome Now,” or something like that. Their reasons:

1. A lot of teams are still in contention for playoff spots (more teams are within 5 games of at least a wild card spot at this point in the season than in any year since the current playoff format was adopted).
2. Attendance and TV ratings are up.
3. The Yankees are a big draw, both at home and on the road.
4. Devil Rays!
5. They’re about to announce what they’re going to do with the Expos. (Speaking of which, they’re playing the Blue Jays this weekend in San Juan instead of, I don’t know, somewhere in Canada?! Well, at least no one will be able to point to a sudden uptick in attendance if there’s a lawsuit seeking to block the move.)
6. Padres!
7. Randy Johnson! Tom Glavine! Roger Clemens!
8. Barry Bonds!
9. There’s going to be an international baseball tournament next March.
10. Eric Gagne!

Comments? Additions? Reasons why baseball sucks, instead?

Original comments…

Levi: I have as little interest as humanly possible in an international baseball tournament. In fact, I’m kind of actively against it. If there’s one thing I don’t need to see again, it’s a stadium of people shouting “USA! USA! USA!”

Actually, I’m always bugged by these lists because of their premise. Look, baseball’s always there. That’s one of its greatest charms. If you’re too busy with other things to pay attention, that’s your loss. Even when they were talking all through the nineties about how baseball was in trouble, attendance was at astonishingly high levels compared to all of baseball history except like 1990-93. It was way high compared to other sports. Revenues were up across the board. And despite a few remarkably mismanaged teams (Sorry, Toby), nearly every team had a shot at the postseason at some point in the decade.

But despite my complaining, I’ll take good news and positive coverage wherever. The Yanks/Red Sox game the other night, on _cable_, won the time slot in NYC. That’s unbelievable for a regular-season game.

And I’d add one more thing to this list: the Cubs. Anytime the Cubs are this successfull, in winning and attendance, it’s good for baseball.

stacey: it should be noted that levi is not always this cranky. he accidentally slept in this morning, and that probably accounts for this grouchy post.

ps: eric gagne is on the all-cute team!

Levi: Yeah, that probably sounded crankier than it should have. The reasons the guy gives are all good, and they’re all fun aspects of this season.

Eric Gagne is so awesome he should be two reasons. And Scott Rolen’s defense should be a reason all by itself.

Steve: I just want to vote that the Padres are decidedly uncool. They may have a new stadium, they may have my initials on their hat, and San Diego may be the home of Mandy Stadtmiller but their uniform looks like a college or minor league team. I could be talking out the other end here but I can’t help but think they are going out of their way to be PC and disavow their “padre-ness” in the wake of the catholic church sex scandal. Instead, they should embrace it. Can’t you see the headlines, “Wells, Beck, Bugger Dodgers.”

Jim: Their mascot, the Swinging Friar, was very visible at the game I went to at Petco Park in May.

Toby: I got some reasons why baseball sucks now
–3 1/2-hour games
–Interleague play (two teams meeting in the World Series that have already played each other)
–Fat managers wearing uniforms (no other sport does this)
–I can’t go one *#!@ing summer without seeing a replay of Fancisco Cabrerra’s hit to win the 1992 NLCS (as if I don’t see that whole inning enough in my own nightmares)
–An average family’s cost to go to a game – approx. $80
–No Jack Buck anymore (and though I used to always defend him when people put him down, Mike Shannon isn’t nearly as good without him)
–Paying for autographs
–No more powder blue road uniforms
–Does every team need a new park every four or five years???
–Too many teams
–A good ERA is in the mid 3’s
And most of all
–An unprecedented 14 years of sucking for the once-proud franchise known as the Pittsburgh Pirates. They will never compete again.

(The point, in case you missed it, is that any sport is fun when your team is winning… and not so much when they’re losing… though my last-place team just swept Levi’s first-place team)

Luke: File under suck:

ESPN’s behind-the-plate ads, seen on TV (fugly!)

ESPN’s behind-the-plate ads, seen in person (fuglier!)

ESPN making Wrigley games night games so I can’t go

Retractable roofs

Fewer double headers

Major League Baseball allowing into the park fans who do not intend to stay for the entire game

MLB allowing fans into the park after the first pitch

Absence of European soccer-style relegation, which would deal nicely with the problem of too many teams

Beers more than $3

Tribune Co.

Rooftop owners

Tribune Co. vs. Rooftop owners

Warm-up jerseys worn during games (especially at home)

The off-season

File under awesome:

3 1/2 hour games!

Fat managers wearing uniforms!

My team winning

Derek Jeter and his game face

Dusty Baker’s contempt for pitch counts

There’s going to be an international baseball tournament this August

Wayner Messmer and the perfect, sub-3:00 National Anthem

$2.25 malt cups

Ed and John

Sox fans blaming the rain on the Cubs

Roadtrip blogs

Johnny Damon’s hair

No more powder-blue road uniforms; less teal

Baseball is all about statistics

Since it’s July 1st, here are some highlights of the June statistics for this site…

  • The busiest day was June 1st. The second-busiest day in terms of requests for pages was June 7th, but the second-busiest day in terms of actual page views was June 3rd.
  • Tuesday was the busiest day of the week, followed by Wednesday, and then Monday and Thursday running neck and neck.
  • The busiest hour was 10:00-11:00 A.M. Central time, followed closely by 7:00-8:00 A.M. There is a dramatic dropoff after the 2:00-3:00 P.M. hour.
  • uchicago.edu leads the list of organizations visiting the site…specifically, press-dhcp-204126.uchicago.edu, which I assume is the computer in Levi’s office. It’s pretty far ahead of covad.net (me at home). Other Chicagoans are visiting the site via enteract.com and tribune.com, and I assume a lot of the comcast.net traffic is emanating from Chicago as well.
  • Apparently, we were mentioned on the forums at sportingnews.com, but I can’t figure out where.
  • Most frequent search used to find the site: “http://www.baseballrelated.com.” You know, you can just type that into your browser somewhere to find the site. Or maybe you like using Google as an intermediary.
  • Other frequent searches: “steve kline tony larussa,” “nolan ryan 235 pitches,” “baseball jingles,” “baseball activities,” “ipod freezes,” and, of course, “gary pappas shaves head.”
  • And it didn’t show up on the monthly report because only one person used these search terms, but I think it’s my favorite search of June: “how much does kirsten storms weigh.” Less than me, I’m guessing!

Original comments…

Levi: It’s not that I obsessively check this page. It’s that I have assigned my assistant, as about 70% of her duties, to obsessively check it and write up reports for me.

Jim: Also, you can’t really access the site anywhere but your office (unless you take your laptop, um, “warwalking”), whereas I can access it from my office, from home, and probably from my cell phone if I’m willing to pay 25 cents a minute. And I get new comments e-mailed to me, so I only have to check the site if I can’t figure out the context of a comment (e.g., when I get an e-mail that tells me nothing but that Steve said “You’re a regular Charlie Lau or whatever the hell that guy’s name is.”

Swingin’ Simon

While the Cardinals were busy losing, again and again and again, to the Pittsburgh Pirates this week, I was thinking about Pirates first baseman Randall Simon.

Who doesn’t love Randall Simon? Well, a certain sausage in Milwaukee might not. And those of us who prefer our hitters to be patient and hit for power, especially if they’re manning first base, well, we might have our quibbles with him once in a while, too.

But is there any baseball fan who doesn’t love watching him hit? There are hundreds of impatient hitters. Rey Ordonez approaches his at-bats as if he’s Cinderella at thirty seconds to midnight. Corey Patterson, until recent weeks, swung at bad pitches as if he were the pitcher’s therapist and wanted him to feel good about himself. But no one I’ve ever seen combines a burning desire to hit every single pitch with an incomprehensible ability to hit just about every single pitch.

Sure, a lot of the balls he hits get fouled off. Or popped up. And he’s never hit for real power. But that takes nothing away from my marveling at his sheer ability to introduce bat to ball. Shoetops, helmet-high, inside, outside, in the dirt. It’s never mattered much to Simon. He’s a superhero of hacking.

And he’s chubby. Even rotund.

Though Simon’s career on-base percentage of .328 is abysmal, his .297 batting average has enabled him to keep a major league job for seven years. But I worry that the end is near: It’s only 100 at-bats, but Simon’s line this year is .210/.292/.280 is bad. He’s not striking out much more than usual, with 10, but he’s also not hitting for any power at all, with only 4 doubles and 1 home run. If he doesn’t come back strong in the second half, even the lowly Pirates (see the first sentence of this post) might let him go.

Who knows what the problem is? Maybe his bat speed is slowing just enough, though you would expect that to be reflected in increased strikeouts. Maybe he’s been unlucky.

But I have a new pet theory. Remember in the spring of 1998, when New Sammy burst on the scene, no longer flailing at curveballs in the dirt? Maybe Simon’s the Bizarro Sammy: he’s more than doubled his walk rate, from a career rate of one walk per 23.5 at-bats to this year’s rate of one every 11 at-bats. Maybe that’s the problem: he’s being too selective. That goes counter to everything I understand about hitting, but we’re talking about Randall Simon. Anything’s possible.

So my advice is to hack away, Randall. I think you shouldn’t take another pitch this season. Not a one.

If my advice works, Pirates fans can thank me later by beating the Cardinals’ rivals down the stretch.

Original comments…

Steve: You’re a regular Charlie Lau or whatever the hell that guy’s name is.

Toby: Ahh yes, thank you, Levi, for highlighting another in a long string of Pirate first baseman who really suck. I can trace it all the way back to the early 80s and Jason Thompson, who replaced “Pops” Stargell. Yes, I know Willie wasn’t really a first baseman–he played there late in his career, but still, he was the last good first baseman they had.

I liked Sid Bream when he played there, but then he went to Atlanta and then in that game 7 in 1992, he slid home with the winning run… So, now I pretty much hate him.

Man, I’ve been on vacation all week and must have built up some real anger. Sorry about that.

There goes the smuggling operation

From the “Returning to the United States” portion of AAA’s “U.S.-Canada Border Information” handout: “Articles considered detrimental to the general welfare of the United States are prohibited entry. These include narcotics and dangerous drugs, drug paraphernalia, obscene articles and publications, seditious or treasonable matter, lottery tickets, hazardous articles (e.g. fireworks, dangerous toys, toxic or poisonous substances) and switchblade knives.”

Lottery tickets are detrimental to the general welfare of the United States? Have the various states been notified of this fact? Many of them seem to be depending on the sale of lottery tickets for a major portion of their budgets. (Hmm, maybe they specifically mean Canadian lottery tickets are detrimental to the general welfare of the United States.)

I guess this means we won’t be able to blow any remaining Canadian cash on lottery tickets near the border. Guess we’ll instead have to stock up on candy that’s not available in the U.S., including Nestle Smarties and Aero bars. (Because we’ll be in Canada less than 48 hours, we’ll be able to bring back up to $400 worth of candy, or anything other than lottery tickets. If we wind with anywhere near $400 worth of Canadian money with which to buy candy, it will either mean an ATM went crazy somewhere or we were surprisingly successful buskers.)

Original comments…

Levi: Jim, if you buy anything in Canadia, the terrorists win.

maura: you can buy aero bars at the deli around the corner from my apartment.

Jim: Along with poutine, Kraft Dinner, caffeine-free Mountain Dew, and Anne Murray CDs?

(Yes, yes, I know Kraft Dinner is readily available in the U.S. under the name Kraft Macaroni and Cheese, or, if you prefer, Cheese and Macaroni. Leave it to the Canadians to just assume that dinner will involve macaroni and cheese.)

Levi: Also, $400 Canadian is equal to about $.28-$.35 American, depending on the prevailing exchange rates. We just might end up with that much money.

Jason: Don’t forget to pick up some ketchup-flavored potato chips.

On second thought, I think you’ve tried them before, so, forget it, after all.

Seligian Shenanigans

The Washington Post just wrapped up a series on how DC or Northern Virginia is about to be the newest area to be screwed over by Major League Baseball. After the All-Star Game, Bud Selig is going to announce where he’s going to plunk down the team he stole from Montreal.

The series is in three parts. The first looks at the remarkably shady dealings that brought us Miller Park. I knew the dealings for that stadium reeked of corruption, but the Post‘s writers get all the details in order, and it’s even worse than I thought.

The second looks at the remarkably shady dealings that brought MLB ownership of the Expos.

And the third looks at the shady dealings still to come, as Selig and his cronies arrive to loot the local treasuries of the DC area to the tune of around $350-400 million.

These articles are some of the first mainstream articles I’ve seen to argue strenously against Selig and his stadium-building boom. They’re well-researched and well-written, and if they don’t make you mad about the tax money being funneled into the pockets of billionaires, then maybe you should go here. The other thing this article does is make me more impressed with Peter Magowan of the Giants and the Cardinals ownership group. Magowan built the first privately funded stadium since Dodger Stadium (Which, it’s important to remember, was built on land that was basically given to the O’Malleys after the low-income people living there were booted.); the Cardinals ownership is trying to do the same, getting some assistance, but not much.

The Post requires you to register, but I bet you all can figure out what to do.

Original comments…

Levi: This doesn’t belong here, but I liked it so much that I had to put it somewhere. From E.J. Dionne, “The plural of anecdote is not data.”

He’s using the statement as a clause to introduce a bunch of anecdotes that he’s using kind of like data, but it’s still a succinct, sharp way to pinpoint what’s wrong with reasoning from anecdotes.

Steve: Thanks alot, Levi. Just when I’ve really been enjoying this baseball season and the tight divisional races you go and dig this up. Grrrrr.

Well back at ya! How about that little league blooper that lost the game for the Cardinals last night? And my grandma can throw harder than Matt Morris.

Levi: Fortunately for my soul, I wasn’t able to see the game last night, and by the time the radio broadcast came in, all I heard was Mike Shannon saying, “Totals and highlights in a moment.”

I think that probably should have been “highlight,” since Suppan’s pitching seems to have been the only one.

But we’re back at ’em tonight. And how many times–apologies to Toby–can the Pirates beat you, really?

Jason: If any other business were run like Major League Baseball, it would be bankrupt and OUT of business.

Levi: Like will soon be the case with the NHL, which seems to be run kind of like MLB, but with worse hair.

Steve: “And how many times–apologies to Toby–can the Pirates beat you, really?”

Apparently at least three times…..

Levi: Thank god tomorrow’s an off day. This team sounds like it badly needs a day off.

And John Mabry might have had the worst day ever. He hit into two double plays, left ten men on, and managed to make six outs if you include the DP outs. Poor guy.

There are no longer any tentative items on the itinerary

The Triptik arrived from AAA. Actually, it’s a 3-volume Triptik because of how many pages they had to try to stuff into it, including a full-page explanation of how much the toll is on the Tappan Zee Bridge, even though we’re traveling in the toll-free direction.

I’ve changed the driving times on the itinerary to reflect what the Triptik claims, and added the distances. The total distance, which I didn’t list on the itinerary, is calculated by them to be 3259 miles. Some say that’s a long way to go for a few baseball games. Others say it’s not long enough. (Should be interesting to see what the actual mileage ends up being.)

I have also made reservations for the final two hotels. In Detroit, we will be staying at the Holiday Inn Express downtown, which is half a mile from Comerica Park (and I’m told that downtown Detroit is reasonably safe to walk through at night).

In beautiful Galesburg, Illinois, the four of us will be staying at the Country Inn & Suites by Carlson, which I guess is named for Gordon Jump’s character Arthur Carlson on “WKRP in Cincinnati.” A suite wasn’t too much more expensive than a room, so I got one of those, which is supposed to have three beds and should keep people from tripping over each other. I assume Levi and Stacey don’t have a problem sharing a bed.

This is all reflected on the itinerary, of course.

Original comments…

Levi: For some reason, Thursday the 26th is missing from the itinerary. That means no Boston.

I know Jim’s incapable of making a mistake, so I assume this is the fault of the Internet.

Jim: Are you familiar with “Brigadoon”? Boston’s like that, except that instead of regularly disappearing for 1,000 years, it occasionally disappears for a few hours. Thats’s why it’s taking so long for them to finish the Big Dig.

Jason: Hopefully today’s earthquake hasn’t destroyed any of Galesburg’s accommodations.

Dr. Otto Octavius: If the earthquake hasn’t, then I certainly will!

Here’s something you don’t see every century

Yes, I know I claimed I wasn’t going to post any more Devil Rays updates until they put another long winning streak together, but Maura practically ordered me to post this…

At one point this season, the Rays were 18 games under .500. Now they’re 1 game over .500.

As of Friday night, they became the first team to claw their way back up to .500 after being 18 under since the 1899 Louisville Colonels.

Original comments…

maura: this run has also inspired some excellent google searches.

Jim: No wonder the Rays are doing so well; Lou Piniella seems to have gone insane. A potential bikini wax is supposed to motivate the team? And between him and Tony La Russa, that’s too many people from Tampa that I’ve been forced to picture nude recently (yes, I know La Russa wasn’t the naked one in the Steve Kline incident, but that’s still a little too close for comfort). The only people from Tampa who I want to think about being naked are Alesha Oreskovich (Playboy’s Miss June 1993) and both Rebecca Romijn-Stamos and Laura Harring’s characters in “The Punisher.” I don’t even enjoy picturing myself nude.

Jason: If you check the 2nd link from Maura’s google search, you might find some pics of me floating around there.

Jim: Jason’s secret other life revealed!

Nineteen!

All right, last Devil Rays update for now, at least until their new winning streak reaches double digits.

I always enjoy how two teams can play completely different games on consecutive days: 2-1 in 10 innings on Wednesday, and then 19-13 on Thursday. So I hope we see examples of both types on our trip.

Original comments…

Jason: Tampa Bay pitcher Dewon Brazelton had a no-hitter going until the 8th in the Devil Rays’ 2-0 win over Florida. It’s their 12th straight interleague win.

Maybe they should trade places with the Marlins.

"That strike zone [stunk]"

The Cardinals and Cubs played a wild game in St. Louis last night, a game which the Cardinals won 10-9, scoring the winning run on a passed ball by catcher Paul Bako, who entered the game in the 9th after starting catcher Michael Barrett and relief pitcher Kent Mercker were thrown out for arguing about the poorly-called strike zone. Midway through that inning, when Mercker didn’t get the call on what should clearly have been an inning-ending third strike to Reggie Sanders, I had thought to myself, “Mercker’s going to get thrown out at the end of this inning.” Lo and behold, Mercker got thumbed after he shouted “Fuck you!” while striding off the mound, followed immediately by Barrett’s shouting, “That’s bullshit!” as he threw down his mask, then repeating it for emphasis as he threw down his glove. The second thumb flew.

They were right. Umpire Sam Holbrook’s strike zone was bullshit. More than any game I can remember since the days of Eric Gregg, the umpire made this game what it was. His strike zone managed to be both tiny and inconsistent. Fortunately, the Cardinals got the best of it.

But there was much, much more to the game than that:

1) The Cubs made three errors. I like to think that is karmic payback for Chip Carey’s constant harping on the Cubs low error totals, which leads him to say “The Cubs’ defense is far and away the best in the league.” And a fantastic play by Scott Rolen to open the ninth was further payback for Chip’s statement Monday that “Sure, Rolen may be slightly outhitting Aramis Ramirez, but Ramirez is having the better year defensively, with X errors to Rolen’s Y errors.” Ramirez has played surprisingly strong defense this year, but the difference between him and Rolen is still like the difference between a speech by Bush and a speech by Clinton.

2) The St. Louis Post-Dispatch has a story today about something I didn’t catch, though apparently it was shown on the broadcast. Steve Kline warmed up in the 6th, but when he wasn’t summoned to pitch, he flipped the bird at Tony LaRussa. According to the story, when informed of this post-game, LaRussa got steamed and broke off the press conference, saying “Give me two minutes and I’ll be standing on top of his chest kicking the (bleep) out of him.”

We all have a pretty good idea what LaRussa said that is being bleeped. But what about what Kline said later: “If he doesn’t want me to get mad, then don’t (lead me on).”

I don’t know (Toby, Scott, Baggarly, Dan: care to weigh in?) exactly what the policies at most papers are on when and how to elide or replace swear words in quotes, but I’ve always enjoyed reading the results. The one rule I’ve always wished would be followed in those situations, though, is this: the person reading, if a mentally competent adult, ought to be able to read the sentence and,without missing a beat, replace the replacement with the original swear word. Kline’s statement doesn’t allow for that. “(lead me on)”? What, I wondered, could everyone’s favorite nasty-hatted nutcase have said?

Fortunately for readers of BRPA2004, the folks at Redbird Nation–though they don’t give a source for their information–have the answer. And it’s a good one. According to them, Steve Kline said: “If he doesn’t want me to get mad, then don’t dry hump me.”

But who cares about a little clubhouse strife after a win like that?

Oh, and while we’re on the subject of newspapers printing swear words, you all might enjoy this article from the Guardian. Not only is it full of swear words, abuse (personal and general), and absurdity, it also includes accusations of Nazism!

Original comments…

Luke: Everything I know about this game I learned from the ESPN running game update, so I didn’t catch all the machinations, but I hope dusty sits Barrett and Bako down and reminds them how important it is for them to stay in the game when there are only two catchers on the roster. In this case, maybe Barrett catches that pass ball, and maybe Hollandsworth is available to bring his .600 pinch-hitting average to the catcher’s spot with two out in the ninth.

2. Similar words — “If you don’t want me to get mad, then don’t dry hump me.” — came up in my last performance review, too.

Sports departments I think do the most — and the most creative — ellisions, because of the foul-mouthed nature of their sources and because sports enjoys the least oversight from the style and policy czars at a given paper. You’ll often see things like “He (upset me)” instead of “He pissed me off,” “that (jerk)” instead of “that asshole” or “(Selig)” instead of “lying motherfucker.”

Levi: I’m sorry, Luke. I should have included you in my list of journalists who might answer my question. I am astonished at how many journalists we have as readers. What are we, Romanesko?

Jim: Why can’t the St. Louis Post-Dispatch be more like the Guardian? “Mr Kline’s mention of dry humping last night is not the first time he has shown an interest in simulated sexual activity.”

But I bet the Guardian doesn’t have Weatherbird!

Steve: Where to start deconstructing these outbursts…. Sounds like someone is wearing his stirrups a little too tight. The implication of Kline’s remarks is that if Tony LaRussa had indeed humped him, he wouldn’t have been angry. Apparently, getting into the game involves a full on “wet” hump. And who has the blue-balls Kline or LaRussa? These men are bringing new resonance to the term “fantasy baseball.” Apologies to those would rather see something along the lines of [sexual-frustration] instead of the more colorful term. This also reminds me of an incident last year over in the NFL where Lions GM Matt Millen called former Lion receiver Johnnie Morton a “faggot.” The only difference is that I saw the derogatory remark printed in more than a few places.

Levi: The last bit of the Post-Dispatch article is also great. Kline, asked about the confrontation–which, remember, took place in the shower, so you have to picture LaRussa in uniform, Kline nude save for his nasty hat–said, “He yelled at me like he usually does. Hopefully, he’ll get over it in about three weeks and we can move on.”

Levi: Last thought on this topic. I think.

Is this not easily the best naked man/not naked man confrontation we’ve heard about since Dale “The Demon” Torborg chased Antonio “El Pulpo” Alfonseca down a hallway and into a broom closet?

Toby: Levi, Sorry, I’ve been out of the loop for a couple of days.

I was watching the Midwest Sports Report live after that game Thursday night and heard LaRussa’s comments live on the air. Fox Sports Midwest suddenly cut back to the anchors after he said “shit” and the anchorwoman–with a giant grin on her face–apologized to the viewers.

As far as our little town paper, I don’t know if we have a policy for disguising curse words – I would say it would probably be right along the line of what the Post-Dispatch did, though,

That article from the Guardian reminded me of a recent column on espn.com that got Hunter S. Thompson in some trouble. He wrote something to the effect that the prison abuse by American captors in Iraq was worse than anything the Nazis did. As you might expect, that didn’t go over very well with many people.

The reason I bring that story up is that I have been desperately searching for a DVD copy of “Where the Buffalo Roam,” the movie where Bill Murray portrays HST. I have been watching it on my 20-year-old VHS copy, but would like to get it on DVD. The problem is it is out of print and goes for around $40 or $50 on ebay. I don’t remember you ever mentioning it, but I would peg you as being a Hunter S. Thompson fan, Levi, so I thought you might have some insight on where I can get a DVD copy without having to pay $40 or $50.

Levi: Toby– I don’t know where you can get that DVD, but I’ll do some looking around and see if I can figure out. I do remember once seeing part of Where the Buffalo Roam on TV, not knowing it as about HST, and being really confused until I figured it out. Bill Murray really was born to play that role.

Oh, and one last note on dry humping: as some of you know, someone some of us know (That part of the sentence was a lot of fun to write!) introduced us to a term her set in high school used to use for dry humping. They called it “Doing simulation.” After a date, a girl would ask another, “Did you do simulation?”

The Post-Dispatch could have gone with, “If he doesn’t want me to get mad, then don’t [do simulation].”

Luke: Puts Kerry Wood’s [simulated] games in a whole new light.

The big letdown

So much for the Devil Rays’ win streak. If there’s any consolation, it’s that they didn’t go out quietly, since it took the Blue Jays 10 innings to win tonight’s game.

Tomorrow, the new streak starts!

Original comments…

thatbob: Well, no. Technically the new streak started the night of the loss. Perhaps tomorrow (ie. today) the streak will continue, 2L?

Jim: No, I meant that a new winning streak would start tomorrow. And it did!

thatbob: Oh.